Help with Anxiety and Panic Disorder

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Help with Anxiety and Panic Disorder
25
Wed, 11-08-2006 - 3:31pm

This is the first time I have ever posted anything on a message board. I have been struggling from "anxiety" since the birth of my last child 5 1/2 years ago. AT that time, they diagonosed me with GERD; however, taking all the PPIs and other prescriptions didn't work. I have also tried every herbal remedy imaginable.

3 months ago, I hit rock bottom. I felt as if I were going to die of a heart attack every single day. I missed work, couldn't take care of my children like I should, and laid in bed all day thinking about my death. It got to the point that I was putting on good pajamas at night because I didn't want to be found dead in my old ones. I would wake up in my sleep in pain and sick just knowing that death was iminent. I was vomiting and also had diarrhea all the time. I have had 3 EKGs, a colonoscopy, endoscopy, stool samples, ultrasound, x-rays, and numerous blood tests. All comes back that I have mild GERD (reflux) and panic disorder. I started with Zoloft which made me feel like a zombie. I now take Xanax XR which seems to help; however, I still have physical discomfort (stomach aches, head aches, body pains, and of course.. HEARTBURN). I miss my old self. I am a people lover and I no longer experience joy in the little things that made me happy.

My marriage is great although I don't know how much more my poor husband can take. My job is semi-stressful and our custom home that we have building for the past year is just about done.

Does anyone else feel this way. I truly feel like I'm going crazy. Please Help!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Wed, 11-08-2006 - 7:33pm

Hi & welcome to our community.

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Wed, 11-08-2006 - 8:18pm

 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2004
Wed, 11-08-2006 - 8:42pm

Hi,

I can relate to the *my life pretty good now-so why do I feel this way?* feeling. Anxiety increases all my minor aches and I've noticed neck, jaw and back pain, along with headaches pop up when I'm getting really burnout and anxious. I "know" it is related to my anxiety, more than any physical cause, but it still hurts! I take a OTC pain pill and tell myself it will work, then try to something distracting and relaxing...it often works.

I haven't had reflux, but my first shot at college after high school, I kept plummeting into clinical depression right around mid-semester, every time and it was accompanied by sudden, severe, chronic diarrhea. Testing for giardia etc., found no physical cause.

I'd get home for break and it would be gone the next morning...back on campus...and I'm living in the bathroom! I dropped out of school and never had it like that again. I'm convinced it was some sort of psychologically induced Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Anyway it sucked and I can understand how painful and confusing this must be.

At least you are on the right track with trying different treatments and looking for the right one to help. Are you seeing a psychologist, maybe talk therapy would help.

Hugs,
Dee

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Thu, 11-09-2006 - 10:27am

Sheri Ann:

Thank you so much for your reply. It's unfortunate but true that knowing someone has gone through the same nightmare as you is comforting. I am hoping this all goes away. I haven't felt like myself for months. Although I wasn't perfect.. I sure felt better.. ha ha.

Thanks again!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Thu, 11-09-2006 - 9:36pm
Meds really do help, as does therapy.

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2003
Thu, 11-09-2006 - 9:38pm

hi there,


i have no great words of advice, i wish i did....but i wanted to tell you that i can relate to how you are feeling.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2004
Fri, 11-10-2006 - 1:43am

I feel for you and can attest that you are not alone!!

        
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2006
Tue, 11-21-2006 - 12:16pm
Hi,
I too have had the anxiety you speak of in the past. I tried to meds for a short period of time, but I got tired of being tired all the time. Try talking to a physocologist. That is what helped me. They will help you see what is bothering you and also give you tools to deal with the attacks. How to breath, how to relax. And soon the attacks become less and less. Helps you to learn to keep your stress under control, how to not tune into every beat in your body. I am alot better than I once was. I have visited doctors and hospitals in the past thinking I was having a heart attack, and also as you stated stuck on the couch. I am not totally cured, but I am living again :). I can tell you the attacks become less and less. As far as seeing someone, if you do not like who you try first, get someone else. I tried 3 different psychologists until I got the help I needed.
Good luck and do not give up. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2006
Tue, 11-21-2006 - 1:08pm

Yes, I feel this way as well.

I just started discussing this with people over the internet yesterday because I don't want my family and friends to know exactly what is happening to me. Everyday for me is a challenge, and concentration on everyday life is completely out of the question. I feel I'm lucky because I don't have children to take care of and in my situation right now I don't think that I could.

When I am done work everyday, I have a couple glasses of wine or beer, just to calm me down. I know that this is probably not the best thing to do, but it is just such a relief to have the thoughts "calm down". I have so many thoughts, and they are very scary because most of them are the "what if's" and I worry about things that I can't control. The number one obsessive worry for me is DEATH. I just can't seem to let it go, and enjoy my life. I am confused as to why I seem to be the only one dwelling on this, and what makes it difficult is I'm only 22. Most people I know are just starting out their lives, and don't have any other concerns than where the next party will be. I think another problem is the fact that I just recently witness my boyfriend's father's death. It was very traumatic for me, and I can't seem to get the vision out of my head. I saw him take his last breaths. Now that has heightend my fears of death, and my existence.

So yes, I feel like I am crazy as well, and that if I'm not there yet, I will be. What is even worse is my problems are caused by my own thoughts, and I can't run away from them.

Oh, my name is Amy by the way, and I'm from Ontario, Canada. I am definetly here if you would like to talk.

Try to take care of yourself.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Tue, 11-21-2006 - 1:18pm

I am sorry to hear that you are having such a difficult time. My name is Cassie and i know exactly how you feel. It helps to talk to someone that understands what you are going through. I hope that you have someone like that in your life... if not, I will listen :-) If you have a doctor, my advice would be to go see your Doctor to rule out any physical problems then go from there. I just had my first therapy appointment last Friday and it helped. I highly recommend therapy as well, witnessing your boyfriend's father's death is probably not helping the sitution. Hang in there Amy....I always tell myself.. this too will pass and it eventually does. It just doesn't feel like it when you're going through it.

My physical symptoms are getting better and I have only had 2 panic attacks in the last month. Keep me posted on how you're feeling. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

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