Please help, new to the board!!!
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Please help, new to the board!!!
| Thu, 01-25-2007 - 8:31am |
I have suffered from this mysterious life consuming "thing" panic disorder for 20 yrs. I'm 36 with a 21 month old girl. I had it pretty well under control with Paxil, taking it since 1997. My father was diagnosed with colon cancer in May '06. He has a colostomy bag now. I'm his main caregiver and I'm responsible for him and whatever he would normally do himself. He's 83, miraculously recovered 100% from the surgery and went back to work p/t to his business he's been running for 55 yrs. He then got slapped with blindness,so now my plate is spilling over.I'm a financial wreck, I have 6 other siblings whom are self centered and think they are great...anyone know what I mean? Anyway, when I try to tell dad I need a break, he gets angry and then I feel guilty. 3 weeks ago I started pulling the hair out of my head, starting off with a few strands at a time,.....that wasn't good enough, I resorted to larger chunks, ripping them from my skull...and no it doesn't hurt. I'm sad cause I look like something from the circus.lol---yea I still try to keep my sense of humor. Does any one know anything about this hair pulling??? I've tried searching but I guess I need a medical term.!!!HELP< I used to joke about pulling my hair out. Please reach out to me and be a pal!! I have no friends out here. I'll tell you why another post.

Hi there! I can relate to how your family is, thinking they are something really great and self centered. Does ANY of your family help you out at all? As far as your dad making you feel guilty...I can understand how you feel torn in that situation and of course you want to give him the best care possible, but you have to take care of yourself too. Like you said, not only do you have him to care for, but a toddler as well. That in itself is a full time job. Something my therapist told me has really stuck in my mind when I feel guilty about taking time to myself...if you've ever been on an airplane, the stewardess will explain how to put on the inflatable vests in the case of a crash in water, she will tell you that if you are traveling with small children or an invalid, you should first put the vest on yourself before putting the vest on the other person. You HAVE to take care of yourself FIRST if you are ever going to take care of anyone else, period. If you aren't there, mentally, physically, then no one will get cared for. There might just come a time where you have to tell your dad, 'sorry dad, but I am going to go out for an hour, is there anything you need while I'm out', if he starts to guilt you, explain firmly that you need this time away and that's the way it's going to be. Let him know where you'll be going, let your family know and then just go. I lost my brother when I was 13, he was at home and very sick and all the stress was getting to me, so I went to spend the night at a friend's house. My brother was a year younger than me and he started crying that I was leaving and my mother tried to make me feel guilty, but I told her that I HAD to get away and that I would be back the next day. I've done the same thing with my husband, because having to care for someone 24 hours a day is extremely stressful.
I believe the pathological name for the hair pulling is (and I'm totally going to mess up the spelling on this one) tricatilamania. I would talk to your doctor about it and see what he or she says and see if there is something that can help.
You are truly an amazing woman. Love yourself, take care of yourself and keep your chin up :)
Welcome to our community! I am sorry to hear about your distress. The term that Amy used for hair pulling is *Trichotillomania.* It can be an anxiety disorder brought about
Thank you so much for responding. Sometimes I feel like I'm mentally not going to make it, know what I mean?? How do I find out about the live chat groups??
Talk to ya soon and look forward to hearing from you again!!
Louann
Thank you so much for responding!! and for the medical term for hair pulling. Do you know of anyone else that has this problem?? I feel so alone. You said there is a live chat tonight, but I did not notice the time? If you get my post before your group please let me know? Thanks and look forward to hearing from you soon.
Louann
I don't know of anyone currently posting here that has shared this problem. If anyone reads this & can help Louann, please post some reassurances to her. Anyone???
As for chat, it's Tues. & Thurs. from 9 to 11pm Eastern time. Click on this link: http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/listsf.asp?webtag=iv-bhanxchat&nav=start
Hi & welcome to our community!
Sheri Ann