Spiritual advice?
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| Sun, 02-18-2007 - 2:45pm |
So I started getting anxiety attacks at Christmas this year all relating to the fear of dying. I obsesse about it and lose so much sleep and really scare the hell out of myself. I then get myself to the doctors and they give me beta blockers for palpitations - they don't work so I try a new drug - Dosulepin. I have been on them for a full 2 weeks now and I am generally a lot better. However no matter how many good days I have when I experience a bad day it all falls down around me.
I can't shake the feeling that I am just predicting what will soon happen, that I am about to die and I have absolutely no control and it sends me into absolute despair. I have started going to the gym more, I try to just ride out the attacks, I try to get angry with them. But they are still haunting me and I'm still scared, I dread that I am about to die because I usually know things or sense things that are about to happen. Do any of you think that maybe some spiritual advice may help me?
One thing I am sure of however is that if I had not found this message board and not received any of your wonderful messages I would not have progressed so far already.
I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
X

I am sorry you are going through this. We are all going to die, and most of us are afraid of it. You need to find a way to not let this fear rule your life.
You sound like you have sought out medical help and gotten medication, and exercise regularly, both of which are good. Do you see a therapist? I think that is just as important as the meds. And I found getting more involved in my church and community has helped me become more connected to the world around me, and less focused on my inner turmoil.
Do you keep a journal? That helped me a lot when I felt like I was spinnning my wheels. All I had to do was read an entry from 2-3 weeks before to see how far I had come.
I would love to see a therapist and really want to sort that out asap, you know how it though, not enough hours in the day and all.
I have tried a journal many times before but I just can not bring myself to read my feelings as it makes me so upset to see what a mess I am sometimes.
Maybe this is some part of the actual problem in the first place? I don't know where any of this came from. I was never like this before, I just had a reasonable fear of dying not an obsession :(
Thank you for the advice and comfort, I will try your suggestions, take care:)
If you're a believer in any faith, spiritual help provides comfort. Here is the link to the Faith & Spirituality board: http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-bhspiritcafe