Haven't been in a while, need to drop in
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| Sat, 02-24-2007 - 4:17am |
I haven't been to this board in probably a year of more. I have had anxiety attacks since my late teens, or so. I used to break out in hives when I was really stressed as a teenager. As an adult I have actually passed out once and have felt like a was having a massive heart attack several times. I never really knew I was actually having anxiety attacks until I made my doctor do an EKG on me. He monitored my heart and did some tests and told me I was fine. I explained to him that I felt pain in my chest often. He explained a little about Anxiety and gave me "Ativan". At that time I was a full-time student, had two small children, a part-time job, and my dh worked such long hours he was hardly home. I guess I was overwhelmed and the Ativan helped me. Soon after I weaned off the Ativan as my life became less complicated. And I was fine for about two years.
Just this past year something horrible happened to my oldest dd. I knew that something was wrong with her because she was acting differently and her teacher kept calling about her bad behaviour at school. I started feeling overwhelmed and I began having palpitations, fear, and just a bad feeling. One day my dd was throwing a fit which is really unusual for her and my other two children were crying. All of a sudden I felt my heart punching within my chest, beating about 100 beats per second, I heard a beeping in my ears and I felt myself passing out. I thought I was having a heart attack and then as fast as it came it was gone. I immediately, went to my doctor's office and he checked me out again, with an EKG and prescribed me with Paxil.
About two months later my dd told us she had been abused by a family member. I felt like my world was crashing around me. I felt like my anxiety had been building because deep downI knew that something was not right. If it had not been for the Paxil I would not have been able to function. We reported the crime to the police and after that things got really bad with the family, our family was basically in crisis.
The whole thing had began in April of 2006 and in Oct of 2006 six my dh was laid off and his benifits ended. Needless to say, I went through horrible withdrawals from the Paxil. I felt lower than crap for about a month. In a way I am glad I am not on meds right now. I feel like I have gotten through the depression and I am dealing with the anxiety. I still have the palpitations, and pin-pricks in my chest, but I feel like now I know what is happening and I can deal with it better.
My dd is in counseling and her conduct has improved and she even got AB honor roll this six weeks. I know that she will probably deal w.what happened to her for the rest of her life, but I will always be there for her to love her and listen. That is motivation to overcome my anxiety.
In the back of my mind I still fear having the next really bad attack. I have been in couseling and I am still testing the whole "safe place" thing. I guess we will see.

Hi Rose, I remember you from last year.
Sheri Ann
I have been bothered ALOT with the *anticipatory anxiety.* That nagging, insecure feeling that another panic attack(mine are always heart attacks, too) is just around the next corner. The meds will help. Your coping skills will help even more. As you heal & move past this disturbing period, you WILL definitely get back to a better place without the anxiety. You can read the posts on our board & see that we're all working to find that place. I know that through meditation, relaxation exercises & belly breathing, I can handle a panic attack alot better. I also have learned to keep busy. Make my *what if* thinking work FOR me, rather than against me. Take a peek @ our *coping tips & tricks* folder below. There's a list of self help books & I would recommend The Worry Cure by Leahy.
Please keep in touch. We care & are so happy that you thought to return to our community for support. You can & will feel better. It never seems to happen soon enough. GL & GBU! (((hugs))) jan
You have been through way too much------ YOU are so strong
to have gotten through all of this! You must have great coping
skills!! =0) How horrible about your dd!! I am sure that her
theapist will help her through this! I would have been totally
stressed!! I hope your dh is working again? Keep in touch and
remember you have done so well! BE PROUD OF YOURSELF!!
HUGS! Judy