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| Mon, 02-26-2007 - 5:21pm |
I would say that I suffer from social anxiety. I have been shy all my life. It has got better with time but it still affects a great deal of my life.
I have a situation now that I was hoping someone could help me with.
I have a male friend who I really have a crush on. I just found out by chance that he is looking to move. Where, why, when...I have no idea because I am too nervous to ask him and too nervous to tell him how I feel about him. I have been so upset since I found out that I feel like I'm losing my mind. This hurts so much. I keep telling myself all I have to do is call him or stop by his place and say hi. He's a great guy. When he initiates contact with me we get along great but I can not seem to do the same. I am so sad. I don't want to lose him yet I can't even talk to him. Does any this make sense? HELP!!!

Hi! I am sorry to hear about the problems with your friend. There are folks on our board who have difficulty with social relationships. It's alot more than shyness. Generally it has interrupted their lives. They have trouble holding jobs. Leaving their homes or attending social functions becomes a nightmare. They generally have
Hello dkm1972! ~!Welcome!~ I'm A little new here too! And I have to say you'll find some really good people here! I too had bad socail anixtey in high school, and I hated giving speeches or even telling people how I feel.Or even speaking my mind/thoughts... That advice Jan gave you was great! I hope this works out for you!
Here is my advice: I hope it helps,
Maybe if you dont feel comfortable talking to this guy try practicing in the mirrow. If you feel silly, so what it will just be you... Speak your heart, this may be a easy way to get use to the ideal. If you dont wanna do it in person, write it in a letter, and Call him up and be like: I dont have the guts to tell you this in person so I thought I'd read it to you... These are just some suggestions, But only do what you want and your heart tells you! I really hope everything works out for you how you hope, I know how it feels to be afraid to speak your feelings/thoughts. I have learned to speak my thoughts/feelings and mind much better than I did in high school..
Good Luck--Best Wishes
GBU
Evelyn
Green Eyed Kitten
I too have improved since High School. I was voted the shyest girl in class; when the other students were filling the ballots they stated that in 4 years they didn't even know what my voice sounded like. I can now talk to my co-workers although making real friends has still been hard.
Usually if someone else starts a conversation, I can do okay. I just can't seem to understand why I can not talk to someone that I care about. It's not just like that with him but everyone. Email seems to be a great outlet for me. I have tried that but because I used my work email he thought it was spam or junk mail. That is an option. I guess that fear of rejection is so strong. It probably has a lot to do with self esteem too; what do I really have to say that anyone would care about.
Thanks for your help!
I'm glad girliee you have came along way!!! You can do this! Let us know how it goes!
Good Luck!!
Xooo's
Evelyn
Green Eyed Kitten
Call him or stop by!
Sheri Ann