Downhill slide, I'm losing it
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Downhill slide, I'm losing it
| Mon, 03-26-2007 - 12:53pm |
I don't know what my problem is all of a sudden. But I'm just so aggrivated and fed up with everything, particularly my kids. I feel like I'm getting angrier and angrier at them. I'm afraid I'm going to step too far one day and hurt my babies. I've never spanked my youngest more than once in a punishment, but I got so irritated I spanked her 4 times (on the diaper, not on bare skin, never on the face or body). I yell at my kids nearly all the time. I try my hardest to raise the right, but it seems like all my efforts gets thrown back into my face. I know they're young, but still, I'm here everyday working my butt off and I get nothing in return to show that I'm succeeding at anything. My oldest constantly lies to me, she's started hurting my youngest. My youngest is hitting the terrible two's so I'm sure you ladies get whats going on there. I try, really hard, to keep this place clean. And my attempts are always futile, my house is a pigsty and I hate it. I feel like I don't do any good at any of this stay at home mom or even mothering stuff. Most days I seriously want to just crawl under a rock and die. I don't feel worth much of anything. In fact I'm inclined to believe that the whole family would be better off without me. I have considered leaving and letting Dave raise the kids. It's not like I'm doing any good anyway. Dave says I'm always mad or irritated and that I don't seem like I'm happy at all with where I'm at. I don't know.

I don't know what to say to help, but I feel your pain. Just know that you are not alone. I am hoping you won't try to hurt yourself, but if you're thinking that's an option, please get help. We have all had horrible days and I know with anxiety, I can be very irritated over almost nothing. If it's more than that, please see someone who can help. Try to believe things will get better.
I am sorry to hear about your anger & frustration, Ashley.
oh ashely:(
(((Ashley))) I'm sorry to hear this is happening :(
Sheri Ann