Hi I am new here

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2007
Hi I am new here
22
Wed, 04-04-2007 - 6:28pm
Hi! I am just looking for a place to get support for anxiety. I have been dealing with it for about 12 years on and off.....I was doing really well for about 3 years until 2006 when I had a huge set back because of a very stressful year and a very stressful move. It came back with a vengeance and I am having trouble getting out of it with just cognitive therapy and a therapist.....which is what worked before but doesn't seem to be working this time around. I am 44 and I've heard the older you get the harder it is to work through it. I am debating about going on meds. So I just was looking for a place to come and talk and share and just feel like I am not alone. Thank you.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2005
Wed, 04-04-2007 - 7:09pm
Kimberly welcome to the board. You'll find alot of support, helpful hints, and friends here. I've suffered anxiety for over 20 years and take medication and therapy to deal with mine. Though I've just started medication about the last year and a half, so maybe there is something to it being harder to get over as we age. Though I'ld never heard that myself.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2007
Wed, 04-04-2007 - 7:23pm
Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. It really does help knowing there are others out there who understand. I had a very strange thing happen with it this time around. I have been able to hide it and deal with it through a therapist....so most friends did not know I suffered with anxiety....but this time around I couldn't hide it because I was just so exhausted all the way around and what I found out is that most of my friends have gone silent...whether they don't know what to say to me or that it makes them uncomfortable...I am not sure....but it has hurt me deeply. People I have been there for through their life trials seem to have abandoned me and that has just been added to how crappy I have been feeling. So again I am so glad there is somewhere to go to speak with others who really do understand...it helps to not feel so alone and afraid.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2005
Wed, 04-04-2007 - 7:50pm
Kimberly it does help a whole lot to be around people who understand your fears. These ladies on this board have helped me so very much. I use to not be able to leave my own home but after over a years worth of support from these ladies I just got back home from a three week trip to another state. I would have never been able to do that a year and a half ago. Since you're not on medication you may want to check with your dr or therapist and see if medication and therapy could help you out. I know we all seem reluctant at first to go that way but if you had another illness you'ld take the medication for it. Just a thought.
Avatar for peoplearenuts
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 04-04-2007 - 9:05pm

You are not alone. I'm 41 and came down with anxiety/panic disorder last fall. I also tried to work through it with therapy but finally my therapist talked me into going on meds. I really didn't want to, but I was having a hard time functioning. It was pretty horrible - I was having panic attacks on a daily basis. An antidepressant did the trick for me. I also had to take tranquilizers for a couple of months because I wasn't sleeping and they were the only thing that helped me sleep.

One of my friends went through the same thing, she was on the same meds as me. (Lexapro and Klonopin). She got off the meds. She said it does come back from time to time but she knows the triggers and warning signs, so she has never gotten it back as bad as her first occurrence.

I honestly think mine is partly hormonal, but I try not to get too hung up on the whys and just deal with it.

I was sorry to read that your friends have been less than supportive. I have been very open about my problem and most people have been okay. No one (besides family) was rushing to help me out though. LOL I think if people haven't been through it they just can't understand it. Plus it's not like something tangible they can "see", you know? Even when we're in the midst of anxiety or a panic attack we look normal to everyone else. This board was a huge help in my recovery - no question or symptom is too weird! Someone here has been there! It's a Godsend.




Edited 4/4/2007 9:10 pm ET by peoplearenuts
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2005
Wed, 04-04-2007 - 10:21pm

Hi Kimberly!

This board is such a great and nurturing place. If you ever have any questions don't be afraid to ask. Our board leaders jan and sheriann are great. My wonder is this time could your anxiety be linked to hormonal changes? That could make it so much harder to get control over it. Meds can be a great way to get the control you need over the feelings. You could also look into behavioral/cognitive therapy. Anxiety workbooks work well for some people as well and can be found in a local bookstore. Perhaps, just finding something that calms you down will do the trick. Exercising, belly breathing, positive imagery,etc. Are great ways to calm the mind. All you could possibly need is to find your calming niche.

We're here for ya!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 04-05-2007 - 5:40am

welcome.gif


Hi, Kimberly! Nice to see you;) You are NOT alone. Many of us have had setbacks with anxiety & stressful events are often a trigger.


Some folks have suggested meds & ITA. That doesn't mean you must take them forever. Just until you regain your footing & learn new ways of coping. We have alot of info in the *coping tips & tricks* folder below. I am partial to belly breathing & daily meditation. Hopefully, you will find some techniques that will help. I know it's hard to imagine getting back to where you were, but it WILL happen.


Join us in chats. Post anytime with questions & concerns. We care & want you to succeed. GL & GBU! (((hugs))) jan


PS Just wanted to add that I have read alot about anxiety & most of what I have read supports it decreases as we age. I am 54 & for me, that has been the case. HTH:)



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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2007
Thu, 04-05-2007 - 7:59am
Hi, thank you so much for your reply. Yes I have done the Lucinda Bassett tape series, workbooks and cognitive therapy and that is what helped me so far regain some of my life back. The only thing I could not do was drive long distances by myself and fly. But my life had gotten back to at least living. But then I had a stressful year last year and it came back hard and now I'm having to start over from square one. Hard to leave the house, and a new one which is having trouble being alone which I never had problems with before. So I am quite frustrated. So it could be hormonal or maybe just the stresses built up again too much and I wasn't being vigilent to the signs and I wasn't taking care of myself. So right now I'm working on the diet part and just trying to get my body back into balance and go from there and try and make a decision about taking meds.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2007
Thu, 04-05-2007 - 8:10am

My panic started because of dealing with a very dysfunctional family....so I am not close to my birth family.....so I thought at least my friend base was good.....but maybe the fact that I never felt safe enough to share this problem with them was a sign I should have paid close attention to.....because I really am having a difficult time understanding the silence I am experiencing. But I can't focus on that I need to help myself right now and find people who do understand which is what led me to here.

Was your friend on meds for a long time and then slowly came off of them? To me the whole med thing is very scarey and I just need to have more info on it. So did the meds work for her to help her remember what normal felt like and then can you be weaned off of them to then work it through with knowledge and breathing techniques? I'm not quite sure why the idea of taking them is so scarey to me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2007
Thu, 04-05-2007 - 8:15am
I am considering taking meds but I am scared and also my therapist and family doctor do not agree on which one I should take so that is not making me feel very strong right off the bat....I'm supposed to make the choice....hellooooo....lol....so if it is not too personal a question can I ask you what med you are taking and did the first one work right away? And how long did it take for them to start working?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2007
Thu, 04-05-2007 - 8:20am

thank you SOOOO much ((big hug))....what a great way to start my day :)

I am trying to figure out which route I want to take....thank u so much for the support.....it is helping already!

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