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Avatar for merriweather
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2007
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Tue, 04-10-2007 - 3:15pm
I am 54 years old (older than dirt) and have been anxious and afraid of everything for most of my life. I may be facing possibly major changes in my life, unfortunately. And I wonder how I'm going to manage. My daughter, my only child, has gone off to college and it will never be the same between us (that is as it should be). But my dh has a worsening drinking problem, that he doesn't realize he has, (that is NOT as it should be). I just can't be afraid of things anymore. -- Things like driving and talking to people and being able to stand up for myself. I wish I could become employed (like any other sane woman), But I was an employer, I wouldn't hire someone like me. I've been fired from a couple of jobs for being slow. I am rather isolated in this tiny town where everyone knows you ansestors. I have no friends here, its my husbands home town. I really never have been gainfully employed either. My anxiety is never just going to go away. I feel as if my life is over and that I have nothing to look forward to. I'm tired of "going down the road feelin' bad" which is what I have been doing all of these years. But I have no idea of how to change things.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
In reply to: merriweather
Tue, 04-10-2007 - 8:25pm

(((Hugs))) Feeling like a valuable person is definitely good for our self esteem.

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
In reply to: merriweather
Wed, 04-11-2007 - 12:06am

Hello! Nice to see someone else that's 54;) I can tell you that what you're experiencing can be overcome. My panic attacks began 36+ years ago, but I am able to cope much better through meditation & belly breathing. I didn't drive for 3 years because of fear but with meds & therapy I got a hold on my fear & was able to use the small step approach & regain my life.


Am I cured of anxiety/panic? Of course NOT! But, though I admit it is not a mind over matter issue, you do have choices. You can allow it to affect you a lot, a little or not @ all. Please consider being pro-active & seeking help. See your family dr. for a good check-up to make sure you don't have a physical illness causing these feelings. Then, follow a treatment plan that is suggested for you.


I noticed right away that you put yourself down A LOT in your post. You must learn to think more positively. You have much worth & value. Raising kids & being a wife is NOT easy.