will the worrying ever end- can i let go

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2005
will the worrying ever end- can i let go
5
Tue, 07-27-2010 - 7:45pm
my son- thinks he is invincible even thoughnhe is on probation. we have supported him so much- emotionally and monetarily. why does he make stupid mistakes. the things i worried about happening last week have happenend this week. How do I cope or let go a bit. he is my son and i know many of you undestand this.
how many years can i deal with this- what happens if he goes to jail? no wonder my daughter has anxiety issues- if i was her i would get the hell out of here.
i know jan you have issues with your child, although different.
i guess i need my own life, but i feeel like such a failure.
Elaine
Avatar for firstglimpse
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 12:03pm

"my son- thinks he is invincible even thoughnhe is on probation"

Sorry, I read this & I wonder if you need somebody to go rule out bipolar. Somebody with this illness is not obviously sick. Yet, they do these strange things at times that just doesn't make sense.

I don't know who you can talk to, maybe his lawyer, or while he's in jail ask if somebody can come rule out bipolar or what. Unfortunately if there is a diagnoses, since he's over 18 (I presume), you will not be told unless he tells you.

I could be totally off of the mark. I don't know the whole story of course, but I read that statement & red flags are starting to rise.




"Only when we are sick of our sickness shall we cease to be sick."

~ Lao-Tzu, from The Tao Te Cheng



"Only when we are sick of our sickness shall we cease to be sick."

~ Lao-Tzu, from The Tao Te Cheng
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2005
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 1:28pm
Actually, i was thinking the same thing. both my dad and brother are bipolar.
Thank you
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 2:22pm
(((Elaine))) You have NOT failed! Though you feel responsible for your son's actions, you are NOT!!! He made the choices & must now face the consequences. If he goes to jail, you will worry about it then. For now, he isn't in jail, so keep your thoughts in the present. BTW, my dd has been jailed & her name has been in the local paper. It's tough, gf): But, we managed to get through it.
I was reading this morning about an online course: How to Quiet the Mind - Would you like to spend more time in the Now and in Presence and less time lost in worries, fears, judgments, and other negative thoughts and feelings? It's possible to become free from the domination of the egoic mind and its fears and negativity. By understanding the egoic mind and following some simple practices, you can master your mind and emotions. You can learn to be happier and more at peace regardless of what is happening in your life. This 8-week course from Gina Lake has information, exercises, videos, and meditations to help you quiet your mind, dis-identify with it, and move into the present moment (the Now), where you can experience your true nature, which is at peace with life and contains all the wisdom you need to create a happy and fulfilling life. I can't post the link on the board, but if you google the author's name, I am sure it will come up. It sounds like something both of us can use.
Also, here's the link to the new iVillage community challenge: Sign up here: http://challenges.ivillage.com/look-good-feel-good It begins Aug. 2nd & will feature relaxation & stress tips, as well as health suggestions. I signed up this morning. It's fun to have a new thought sent to your email each day. From there, you can post to the community board to get more ideas or read others who post. There's really no active participation, if you don't want too. Just the daily email for 6 weeks.
GL & GBU! I hope you feel better soon. jan
 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2005
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 6:57pm
Thanks Jan- I will google her name and sign up for theother. i have also been listening to zencasts and that has been helping. i hope your daughter is ok today and that precious baby inside of her. I pray alot for the baby you and your daughter.
Elaine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Mon, 08-02-2010 - 5:27pm
TYVM, Elaine. I appreciate that. GL & GBU! (((hugs))) jan