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| Thu, 07-28-2005 - 10:47am |
Well do you think I could feed myself my yogurt & fruit in a bowl at work today ? Hell no had to get the young strong wardsmen to bend the spoon for me so I could get it to my mouth.
Well that started a round table discussion on my current kitchen utensil usage at home. They just dont make any great looking bent knives spoons & forks, I say so I have a few normal bent ones courtesy of my son. So looks like I will have to have a bent supply at work for days when my wrist is stuffed.
On a brighter note, I have booked 7 days holidays for my kids & me (hubby working ) at the gold coast, for those of you who dont know it is south of the Barrier Reef on the east coast QLD. I got a ground floor apartment that walks straight out on the beach. I gave my kids their choice of where for holidays, & I thought they would pick the snowys, considering we live close to the surf. So it looks like I will be flogging it out on foot to theme parks and shopping malls for 8 days......Ah I love my kids so I guess I can do this for them and just play with them, and together we will have a wonderful fun time. lell

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Aaah, Lell, I find it remarkable that no manufacturer of silverware has thought to put out a bent set!
Molly
Lell,
Yes I agree I think its time for us savvy gals to invent charming silverware for the flexion problems we all get or have. Hmmm...gold or silver? I always wanted a silver spoon in my mouth, lol. Maybe jewel encrusted? NO, monogrammed in platinum with tiny glittering diamonds. I'm sold. Whatcha think?
And your holidays sound lovely. My husband and I were watching rugby last night and we had the discussion that if we could make some money on our stocks we should save and take the kids to Austrailia/New Zeland for a 3 week holiday next year. (we are reconciled at the moment, he is in counselling)> he lived and worked down under for a year and wants to go back. I would love to go, its just the flight that turns me off. 24 hours from Canada??? EEEKKK.
Be gentle with yourself on those holidays. I love your posts.
Namaste
Holly
Holly I think we have a $$$$ idea here, What shall we call our company " THE URI GELLER COLLECTION" ? or the "ROYAL RA COLLECTION" "THE HOUSE OF STYLE"??. You can be the designer of the designs. jewel encrusted. monograms etc. I be the brains behind the operation, I shall get right on it tonight and start expanding my mental power ability.
Do you know we could even venture beyond good looking bent cutlery and have matching tableware with raised sides.
On a serious side I have always found kitchen items & utensils to help people who are impeded, insulting in there very uglyiness, I would rather bend the normal ones I have.
Well if you come over to OZ, you shall just have to pop up and meet me and be my guest for a night or two. Love lell.
Molly
Stupid question time. You'll find I ask quite a few of those as I learn. Is the problem with your hands, wrist, or elbows - or all of the above? My mother has scleroderma and basically her hands are like claws. She is unable to straighten her fingers. She uses the silverware with the large handle which she can hold in her hand instead of her fingers. Take care and I hope the silverware design business pays off!
Deb
Dear Deb,
The problems with my hands are "all of the above". On the left I have one finger which I cant close, plus the same wrist problems as the right. The right hand basically swelling most days across my knuckles , reducing wrist mobility and nodlues. Like all good RA joints, they are better some days and cactus the others. On days when my right wrist is bad I need the spoon to be at an angle, as my wrist just cant seem to swivel to line up a direct hit with my mouth, short of hitting the person next to me in the face with my elbow.
I have a few normal spoons which my son has bent at an angle for me. On bad nights I will eat my veges with the spoon, and hubby sadly cuts my food to smaller portions when it becomes painful to cut food. I do regular finger exercises and wrist mobility movements, but the ravages of this disease are slowly catching up with me, and I fear it will be my hands which dictate when I will be no longer able to work. I have a hot wax bath thingy which I pull out occasional & emerse my hands in the hot wax, the relief from the stiffness & pain it gives is great...plus nice smooth baby skin.
DEB the RA foundation has a great saying which I hang on my fridge.
MOVE IT OR LOSE IT.
Deb the best thing you can do for yourself with RA is get the tools you need to assist you in your daily living, and have a good attitude. Lell.
Bless you!
I don't even know what to say. I am so humbled. I have not been able to cut up my food for just 4 weeks due to surgery but this is so much a part of your life. I wish I could take a portion of your everyday struggle. Know that you will be in my thoughts and prayers every day.
I seem to be able to have the positive attitude toward dealing with RA until I have to have surgery to correct something that RA has taken away. Then it just becomes too much. I have two young boys that I want to give the perfect childhood to...
How old is your son (the one that bends silver)?
Take care,
Deb
Dear Deb, you dont need to be humbled, we all here have good days when we can do most things, then bad days, when we need a bit of help. I have 2 children, aged 14 & nearly 19. I was diagnosed nealry 5 yrs ago now, and was in a flare for most of it. I slept for long periods sometimes 15 - 18 hrs. I think back and wonder how on earth I didnt know I was sick. I worked mostly night duty and would sleep all day then go to work and sleep all night at the desk, and other staff would do my work. I just couldnt stay awake ! That was all before the pain of the full on flares kicked in. Then many days I would need my kids to help me out of bed to get to the bathroom of a morning or do things like do my bra up or button my top etc. My housework became a no go for about 3 yrs. I was just incapable of vaccuming even 1 room without being utterly exhausted. I didnt hang clothes on the line, I didnt shop, the only thing I did was cook tea and go to work 3 days a week, but at my worst I could only work 4 hours, and for the life of me I honestly dont know how I did it, I was sicker and in more pain than the people I was looking after in hospital. But I survived on regular analgesia. 4th hourly soluble panadol and digesic. Now I only take something every now and then, usually after a busy shift at work.
Deb I understand your worry about caring for your children and running a house when you are not well. For the time being you need to just set a few priorties on what you can & cannot do. For me to continue to bring in an income I negotiatied with my work place and had there support to work short shifts ( but for their generosity, I also go in when called to work ) I let my house proud cleanliness go on sick leave. I decided it was not important to have clean skirting boards or tops of cupboards, or even clean carpet. My children at the ages of 10 & 14 where given saturday morning "rooms" to do or jobs, clothes off line, peel potatoes etc, and I was mindful of the things I asked them to do for me (and my Hubby) but I just needed help, and in all fairness it has not hurt them, they are members of this house and I asked no more of them then what my mother asked of me when I was a child.
I will say that at first they were worried I would die, but I sorted that out, and gave them permission to ask me any questions they wanted too, but Gabrielle started to have some problems, so on a spur of a moment one day I asked her if she would like to wag school and spend the day with me and see what happened at my OT appointment,& the other appts I had that day. So she came with me sat & watched what they did, came to the docs with me sat in another waiting room......and at the end of the day said she was glad she came, there was no mystery anymore. And I had no more problems with her.
For your two sons who you want to give the perfect childhood too, well we just have to think about what is the perfect childhood?
My kids know I love them, they are lucky in they have a mother, who is alive, and basically well even on bad days. We sit around the kitchen table at night and I ask them "what did you learn today?" We play board games, and my son thrashes me at chess, I sit and let my daughter design my hair !! or practise putting make up on me, or we have a book reading competition, to see who finishes a book first. We play the odd game of scaring the daylights out of each other, with the unexpected boo or scream, I give them the best I can, and I dont think at the end of the day they will feel they missed out because I didnt make their beds, or go to every sporting event or they did extra jobs around the house.
Deb, RA robs us of many things, but it can give some things. We can take the time to smell the roses, so you can raise your boys and you will be aware of how great some of the time you spend with them is and actually value it. So dont you dare feel guilty that you are not measuring up, ask them what they love about you the most. It may very well be your laugh, or the perfume you wear, or that you buy a certain biscuit, or make the best sandwich, or you tell the worst jokes, but they think you are cool. I doubt any child would say mum the best thing about you is you can run around the block in 5 minutes & 15 seconds, or you keep a great schedule running me around town between friends & sport, or you keep this house and my room just spotless, or my shirts are ironed and the washing smells great, you do a wonderful job there mum !
So deb you just dont worry any more about those baby boys of yours, just love them, be proud of them and feed them heaps and before you know it they will be wonderful men. lell
Lell,
You brought tears to my eyes. It seems we have much in common with parenting & having RA. My kids know I'm not the rough and tumble mom, but the best cuddler/story reader/card playing/game playing "Listening" mom! I was dx when my dd was 3 months old and my son was 2. I don't even know how I did it, I used to cry changing diapers and sleep at every moment possible.(It was just me and the kids, my dh worked away from home then, and no family!) We played on the floor all day, lol, cuz I couldn't get up! To be truthful there is lots I do remember, but most of it was a blur until about 2 years into it and my flares were under control. Its amazing how we adapt, and I think our kids become more compassionate, helpful, understanding and caring individuals because of it. And I also think it makes them health conscious, since I'm such a health nut now, except for my chocoholic days!
Lell you always inspire me. Thank you for the wonderful post.
Blessings
Holly
Lell, that was a wonderful post!! So well put, I am standing here giving you a standing ovation!! Oops, I almost wrote ovulation!! HAHAHAHAHAHA My brain is absolutely dead today, from having my dgd for 3 days!!
Hugs, Vicki
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