Anyone see Dr. Phil tonight?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Anyone see Dr. Phil tonight?
2
Wed, 07-23-2003 - 12:10am
So I'm watching Dr. Phil & he did a show awhile back on single women & named it Project Single girls. He had a woman challenge him in tonight's show saying that we need to look at men as well in their thirties to see what the problem is.

Dr. Phil says you have to take an autopsy of yourself. For example if your last 10 relationships failed, you are the common denominator...you need to address that.

I started to really get bummed, because I have analyzed myself (like he suggested) & have been is so much damn therapy that I have finaly felt like...I will never have good self-esteem, I am the way I am & shouldn't someone love me for the way I am...faults & all? THEN he says that someone should love you for who you are & you shouldn't try to change to be something else.

I don't see guys out there working on themselves. Some of the advide he gives is good, but I just am bummed. I am 37 & never been married & recently (again) broke up with someone...my choice. I won't go into but let's jjust say he was a loser. I picked wrrong...I admit it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 07-23-2003 - 10:00am
Hey Fun, good to see you here again :)

I didn't see Dr. Phil, I wish I did! that sounds like a very interesting show.

Well - let's see, I'm 37 & never married either. So we have something in common.

If I do a quick look back - I see that I always chose the wrong kinds of guys. And - yeah, I had some issues that caused problems too. Mine being my insecurity & my inability to keep my mouth shut (accusations & crazy stuff).... so that is something that I have worked on over the past couple of years & have finally been able to overcome (for the most part). I drove any good guys away with that. I know I was impossible to deal with.

Do you feel that there is anything about you that should change, in order to attract the kind of guys you want? If not - then fine :) You just haven't met the right one.

But - the other factor is the guys. Women tend to analyze more & therefore consider themselves & what they can do to make themselves better people. I think guys are more "Hey, take me as I am". Most of the guys I know are that way.

I have to agree with that woman on Dr. Phil - that we need to look at men in their 30's too. The quality out there - well, it ain't so great. (Ouch, someone just threw a rock at me, LOL) Sorry - but I feel it's true. The values today.... eh.

There are good ones & bad ones. And yep - the good ones can be very hard to find. I wish I had a secret for that.

Anyway - thanks for posting that - it's very interesting & makes ya think, you know?

Hugs, Julie

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2007
Wed, 07-23-2003 - 11:50pm
I'm starting to think, the only people that watch Dr. Phil are women. The only men that watch him are the ones that are forced to by their women. So naturally he would have a project called "Project Single Girls", since girls/women are the only ones watching. Personally, I think he should have stayed with the weekly visits to Oprah and his books. A little bit of him, goes a long way...and I agree with a lot of his advice.

A thought: My daughter who was speaking with a counselor after one of her breakups said, "Where do I find these losers?" Her counselor's response was, "They find you".

My philosophy: I am celebrating my 12th wedding anniversary this week with my third husband. (I have never been in a marriage this long since my 2 ex's forgot to stop dating when we got married). I see it as....I saved the best for last. Maybe that's all that you're doing.

Turn off Dr. Phil for a month and see how YOU feel. After all, he's out to sell his show and his books, so he has to be controversial. Most of us don't really want controversy in our daily lives.

Good luck.