How to cope..
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|Tue, 07-29-2003 - 6:12pm|
For the last 3-4 years things have been on a horrible downward spiral. After the death of my very close grandfather and an even closer great grandmother I had to quit college to move home to help support my grieving mother and grandmother. I began working full time which made me feel great. Met a guy who turns out today was a complete mistake (long whole other story behind that). I tried to start attending classes again after my fairly well off dad decide to help pay tuition. Well after a long drawn out arguement between him and his now ex wife (my mother) he cut me off. Leaving me to having to quit once again. So by this point, i lost my grandfather, grandmother, father fiance (long story)all in the matter of a year and half. Financially things have been falling apart and i cant seem to keep my head above water. I started recently dating a man about 4 months ago and things were going great. Then by total mistake I found myself pregnant with his baby. Whether anyone supports or disagrees with my decision i had no choice (medically) to terminate the pregnancy. Which emotionally has been very hard on me. Because if it werent for medical reasons I would have carried the baby. My boyfriend and I were doing great when just the other night he tells me he is not in love with me and ended things.
I dont know how to cope. just as soon as i think things are getting good, things get swept out from under me. im really start to lose my sanity here. and my self esteem has taken a real beating from everything. all day today ive been sitting here crying and getting angry and just think enough already... well i guess i ended up not asking anything. i am just feeling isolated and alone. and didnt know where to turn. thanks for reading this if you got this far. i just dont know what to do. i try and try and all i seem to get is heart ache.