Birthday Bummer - call me a whiner

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-1999
Birthday Bummer - call me a whiner
5
Mon, 10-06-2003 - 8:40am
Okay, first off I will admit it, I'm whining today. This is a very trivial complaint but I need to vent somewhere.

Last week it was my birthday so Saturday night I went to dinner with 3 girlfriends and one of their husbands. My best friend picked me up at my condo and gave me some decorative Halloween items. They were cute but two of them are basically useless because even thought they look like something you put a candle in and light so that the glow emits from the cut-outs the paint is flamable so, what's the point of it? That's another subject. I appreciated the gifts and we went off to dinner.

We met our friends at the restaurant and had a nice dinner. Usually, someone steps away from the table that tells the waiter we have a birthday, please put a candle on whatever dessert we order so that we can sing happy birthday. No one did that. Then, the other two girls arrived without any presents or cards. Okay, maybe they were really busy during the week and will give me something another week. That does happen. But when the bill came it was divided evenly 5 ways. Now here's where I will start to whine.

It's a tradition among my friends that the birthdya girl/guy doesn't pay for their dinner. Somehow though, this tradition was forgotten. How does this happen? As I said, in the big scheme of things (the war in Iraq, homelessness and hunger in America), this is a trivial matter but c'mon, our birthdays only happen once a year. It felt like everyone forgot other than my friend who game me the Halloween items.

(sigh)

I'm really going to try and let this go but next year when it's their birthdays I can't promise I'm going do my usual and go out of my way for them. I mean, do you think they even realized they included me in the bill? I handed my money and no one said, 'Oh, wait a minute, you weren't suppose to pay anything'. Do you think they wondered why the bill was so reasonable? Thank goodness I threw in an extra $20 in my wallet that night or I would have had to admit I didn't have enough on me.

Okay, I'll stop whining now. Go ahead and let me have it. How childish am I being over this matter. Is there a proper or mature way to let them know this is bothering me?

Hugs,

Ben

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 10-06-2003 - 3:15pm

Well Bennie, I think your "whining" is not whining at all & is totally justified.


It was your B-DAY!!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-1999
Mon, 10-06-2003 - 3:47pm
Thanks Sweettie, you put a smile on my face as I was reading your post. I mean, what is the matter with some people? Some days it feels like everyone else in the world has no common sense or consideration but us.

In the case of your boyfriend's family, I don't know what to say. I would have felt the same way you did - forgotten. Couldn't they have gotten one small pizza with mushrooms for you? I do that with friends all the time. I like to have eggplant and chicken or onions and peppers on my half and they get whatever they want on the other half.

Now I'm trying to write up a quick thank you gift to my friend who gave me the Halloween gifts. As I may have mentioned in my post, two of the gifts are almost useless. I didn't go into detail but I will here. They look like something you put a candle in and light it up but, they are flamable so basically they will just sit there doing nothing. They look like ceramic black paper bags with orange paint on the inside and there is a pumpkin face carved out of the front. As I said, it looks like a votive candle should be inside so the little flicker of light shows from behind the face. Then she gave me a pumpkin scented candle, which I can't use with her gift but can burn in another candle holder, and a scarecrow that stands about a foot and a half tall.

So, I will thank her for the gifts but say nothing about dinner, right? I mean, the company was nice but since I paid for my dinner, I really don't need thank her for it, right? Is there an I-Village ettiquette board where I can post this question?

Oh, the troubles we deal with in our daily life. To thank someone for not buying me dinner or not, that is the qustion.

Hugs,

Ben

P.S. The Halloween decorations are another topic entirely. Since I have very little storage space I really don't need any more Halloween decorations. She gave me a similar gift last year. Do I politly mention - no more Halloween decorations as future gifts? I say, give me a gift certificate to a store or salon and I will buy what I need. Otherwise, many of these gifts will be added to mom's future tag sale pile.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 10-06-2003 - 4:04pm

Glad you liked my post.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-1999
Tue, 10-07-2003 - 8:54am
Okay, here's how my day ended with this saga. The restaurant we went to is Italian and they serve dinner family style - big bowls of pasta or platters of entrees. We ordered one penne alla vodka, a chicken special with artichoke hearts, tomatos and zuccini or squash (the green veggie, not the yellow, I always get them mixed up) with a sauce and a veal marsala. As usual we ordered too much food. The pasta was great and there was maybe one and a half servings left. The chicken was great, all that was left was some of the artichokes, tomatos, zuccini or squash and some sauce. The veal was tasty but hardly touched. We told the busboy or waiter to divide the veal into two containers and the pasta into one. One person took the pasta home and my friend and I took the veal home.

I planned to eat the veal last night so all I bought on Sunday were some vegetables to cook up. I started my vegetables and was looking forward to adding them to the veal. Guess, to my surprise, what was in my container when I opened it up? The rest of the sauce from the chicken, 4 1/2 artichoke hearts, some zuccinini/squash and tomatos. I was so angry. My friend got all the veal, probably 2-3 meals worth for her.

I could have stopped what I was doing and gone over the get the veal but I was already dressed in my comfy sweats and wearing my slippers. Half my meal was cooked, I didn't feel like leaving the house.

(big sigh)

Luckily I had some chicken breasts in the freezer. I plopped one in the pan with the sauce from the chicken and simply cooked it up.

Did I get ripped off or what?

Okay, I need to let this go and simply use it as a funny story in a year or two. But, I still need to write a thank you note for the Halloween gifts. Hmmm, maybe I'll work on that as I nibble on my breakfast.

Here's to something better coming down the pike twords me. Right? I need some good karma or something.

Hugs,

Ben

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 10-07-2003 - 11:47am

Awww, it just doesn't end does it??