I so desparately want to be noticed!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
I so desparately want to be noticed!
Tue, 10-07-2003 - 7:34am
I've been writing a lot here lately, but I've just been feeling out of place. I want so much to be the person that everyone gravitates towards, but I have a long way to go to be that person. My shyness is what kills me. I tell myself that I should join groups. I joined the Jaycees after my friend told me how you meet so many new people. Yeah it was great the first time, but then there were times where she couldn't go to the meetings and I would go and feel so out of place. I knew I made others uncomfortable with my silence. I get overlooked. I'm one of those people who could walk in a room and not have anybody say hello and then someone could walk in right after me and everybody would be happy to see them. I didn't go to many of those meetings. Or when I did go I'd get someone who would say "oh aren't you chatty tonight" after I said two words. They were thinking they were being funny, but it really hurt me because I don't need to be reminded of my shyness. Then I joined a kickboxing class with my friend. It was fine when I went with her, but the few times I went by myself I felt like I got weird looks from everyone because I would stumble over my words when I would try and talk to someone. Once again, I stopped going. I know that this same thing would happen if I joined anything. I would be put in the background and thought of as weird. I joined a gym and I do go to that regularly but no one approaches me there. Even the trainer who gave me a few lessons the first few times walked right past me, looked at me, and didn't say a word. It's like he didn't even remember me a month later. I don't leave an impression on anyone and everyone seems to steer clear of me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-1999
Tue, 10-07-2003 - 12:15pm

I know you are shy and this is a very difficult subject for you.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 10-07-2003 - 2:57pm

I wish I had some good advice.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 10-08-2003 - 1:49pm

I meant to send this the other day. I read this whenever I start to think weird things...

The Four Agreements

Be Impeccable with Your Word

Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

Don't Take Anything Personally

Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.

Don't Make Assumptions

Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

Always Do Your Best

Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstances, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.