Is it worth trying for this friendship?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-29-2003
Is it worth trying for this friendship?
1
Mon, 12-01-2003 - 1:50pm
Is it worth sending a Christmas Card to this guy and in it asking him if he even wants a friendship with me? I guess you could say we dated, which if by that it means going out for the first time 12 years ago in college for like a month and then he just faded away and then had it out with me over something that was out of my control and hated me and then made up with me 2 years later and we would go out a few times every year and then he would fade away again. He called me out of the blue after 5 years of no contact about a year ago. And when he did, it was to talk for about 10 minutes and then said he had to go. I asked him to go out for dinner and we did and it turned romantic again for about 2 months and then all of a sudden we were just friends again. Been just friends for 10 months now. He recently moved away for a job, but a few months beforehand he had brought me a flowering plant to say thanks for being a friend. This kind of came from about 6 months prior when things were romantic and he said he would bring me a flower the next time we went out and he never did bring me one. I brought that up about 2 months before he brought me this plant, while we were in the "just friends" mode. What is going on in his head and why does he flip flop so much with me? I either want him to really try for a friendship or nothing at all because I put way too much effort and energy into this and get nothing back. I just want to know why, for the 3rd time in my life, he made the first move to make up with me after years of no contact or just contact me after so long, only to not really want to try for even really a friendship? Why come back into my life at all then?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-1999
Mon, 12-01-2003 - 2:08pm

Hmm, I'm no expert here but I say forget about him.

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