How you deal with triggers ?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2008
How you deal with triggers ?
11
Tue, 10-28-2008 - 4:05pm

I just wanted to ask everyone what is your coping mechanism

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2008
Wed, 10-29-2008 - 8:08am

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-21-2008
Wed, 10-29-2008 - 9:30am

I often tell myself everything is fine, and then support it by remembering people around me or what I believe in. I have a few phrases that when I'm either really low, or really anxious that I say because they trigger me to calm down.

~ Rain   
       
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2006
Wed, 10-29-2008 - 10:11am
i would reassure myself that some other woman may look like my boyfriend's type but he's with me because he chose to be, maybe even remind myself what makes him and me compatible. i would then reassure myself of my good qualities (instead of depending on my boyfriend to do so). if you have trouble with this, you could make a list of your good qualities, jot them down on a little piece of paper and carry it with you so you can pull it out when you need reassurance. i don't know, just a suggestion.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2008
Wed, 10-29-2008 - 4:22pm
Yep that is what I am looking for validation from someone other than me I know it has to come from me but I just want to feel it 100%from him and he has caught on and he says you know I love you and you know your pretty ect.. but at that moment the (trigger time) is when I need his reassurance to help me build up my feeling of oh well yea she is hot but I
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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2008
Wed, 10-29-2008 - 4:25pm
Thank you Rain that was a great link


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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2008
Wed, 10-29-2008 - 4:30pm
I think I am going to try that too it is just hard now I don't know if anyone else is noticing but the women and girls are wearing less and less and the teens look like they had boob and butt growth hormones put in their milk LoL (or it is just the jeans and a push up bra?) but it is hard feeling the way I do most of the time and turning on TV to see women dressed like that or acting provocative then going to Walmart and seeing it live . it just seems like the need to look good has went overboard ? just my thoughts


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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-21-2008
Wed, 10-29-2008 - 5:15pm

"I don't know if anyone else is noticing but the women and girls are wearing less and less and the teens "


My eleven year old cousin talks how much she loves her boyfriend, how she likes her coffee, and how this skirt is too "old lady-ish" thus she wants to

~ Rain   
       
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2008
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 10:58am
I am right there with you my daughter is 15 wears a size 3/4 and has enough boobs for the both of us LoL and she wants to wear what is in style now short shorts tank tops and I say nope sorry one day maybe the fad will be longer shorts and less revealing tops and it isn't like I make her look bad or wear granny cloths I am just trying to make her understand that when you dress and act a certain way people tend to cast judgements about you based on how they see you and if she dresses to get that much attention she may get the wrong type . and I tell her you don't have to have your shorts up your butt or your boobs hanging out to catch a boys eye after all you want him to see the real you right?
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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-21-2008
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 11:01pm
I hope the trend passes soon!
~ RainCL for Self-Esteem Support

"One Step At A Time The World Will Be Traveled"

~ Rain   
       
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2007
Sat, 11-01-2008 - 10:02am

Not to minimize your trigger, but I think you just answered your own question.

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