living suddenly single?!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2010
living suddenly single?!
Fri, 01-29-2010 - 8:51pm

I am so angry!

I have recently moved back in with my Mother in my home state after living 2 very stressful years in New York City....

It was stressful because I had a high maintenance job where the staff was way too ungrateful of all of the work I was doing..

It was stressful most of all because I was a preschool teacher where the salary was so bad and I was supporting myself and my unemployed boyfriend for almost an entire year on this horrible salary in one of the most expensive cities in the world...

It was way too much to handle on my own. I payed the rent, the cable/internet, my phone bill, my credit card bill, my transportation, groceries, etc. all on my own with hardly any help. In November of 2009 my boyfriend finally got a job, but it did not pay enough.

I ran out of all of my money and I got into debt. I had to move back home and leave my boyfriend in NYC on his own because I just could not support the both of us anymore, hardly myself!

Last night after being back home with my Mother for 2 weeks, I have just become so gloomy and I feel like the biggest failure. I left my boyfriend behind, am dirt poor and in debt, and feel like the biggest loser.

Late last night my boyfriend called me to say

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-10-2009
Sat, 01-30-2010 - 4:36pm

welcome, annie-shar. you ARE a great woman, and your ex is an ungrateful jerk. i know it's hard to see that right now, but in a few years you will look back on this time and wonder what you were thinking. right now, though, just take some time to regroup and figure out what you are going to do next. i had to move back home at 25 and i felt like a failure, too, but sometimes that is the universe's way of saying, "slow down and stop putting so much pressure on yourself."

also, marriage isn't everything - just because your old friends are married or engaged doesn't mean they're happy. not that all married people are unhappy, but you have something they don't: complete and utter freedom. you can do whatever you want and don't have to answer to anyone. you get the whole bed to yourself :) you don't have to worry about joint tax returns or double loads of laundry or someone else finishing the ben & jerry's without telling you. so, i consider you to be very lucky. enjoy your freedom while you have it!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2007
Sat, 02-06-2010 - 10:53am

Wow....well, as I was reading your thread, I couldn't help but think...."My goodness, this woman has been blessed!"