Why do women get so jealous?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Why do women get so jealous?
3
Wed, 05-26-2010 - 10:52pm

Why do women get so jealous of each other? It's like one second they meet and it's this mental thing that lasts for ages. Why can't we be more like men and just physically fight, then its done and over with?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-10-2009
Fri, 05-28-2010 - 11:22am

jealousy usually comes from insecurity, and both are rooted in fear. when you feel insecure, you're afraid that someone is going to take your boyfriend away from you or that nobody likes you, for example. when you feel jealous, you're afraid that someone else has something that you don't and will therefore outlive you (it's a survival thing, really). women being jealous of each other is probably just that - that someone else will survive and they won't. it's kinda stupid, actually, since nobody lives forever, but ancient humans didn't understand that so we're stuck with the survival instinct. the best thing you can do is just see it for what it's worth and not buy into the jealousy game.


as for the mental fights - i like to call them cold wars - everyone has their way of dealing with anger. and it's not just a feminine thing; i know men who do the stonewalling thing, too. it just depends on how you were raised. a lot of people aren't comfortable with confronting their issues, and others like to hold on to things. also, some people just like drama. if you don't like cold wars, then talk about something right when it bothers you - if the other person gets stony then that's their problem. i like to get stuff off my chest because i'd rather not waste energy staying mad and i hate drama. i'm not saying i would punch someone in the face if i were mad at them, but physically letting go of anger is more rewarding than mentally holding on to it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Fri, 05-28-2010 - 1:26pm

Hellos,


Ah, thanks for your input, it helps. Although, I wouldn't call it "stupid" but more how our brain works. I do agree with you that it is a survival trait; however, the oldest part of brain still is involved with emotions, our body natural reflects (breathing, heart pumping, etc) and mating. I also do agree though that we are in what day and age, it's not as if the next person is suddenly going to become a god.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-10-2009
Tue, 06-01-2010 - 8:21am
cool, glad i could help :)