Belated Welcome, Shavtay2007

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Belated Welcome, Shavtay2007
1100
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 10:32am

Hi Tziporah,


I am so sorry that this is such a belated welcome to you. I've been absent from the board for nearly a month - so many things have been happening in my life that it was difficult to also come here. The good news is that life has somewhat calmed down (but I'm still crossing my fingers and my toes), which means that I'm back on iVillage.


I am so very happy to see you here, participating and sharing in our conversations! I hope that we'll get to know each other better in the coming weeks.


Welcome again!


(PS: I love the sound of your name!)


Please visit these other great message boards:
Cranio-Facial Abnormalities
In Vitro (IVF)



Avatar for nawleansdarlin
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-1999
Fri, 04-06-2012 - 9:40pm

Hi Tziporah,

I actually came tonight to tell you I have figured out what is stressing me out so much that I am biting my lips at night.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2007
Wed, 04-11-2012 - 11:48pm
Hi Karen, I didn't know anybody could drive a moving van. I thought you needed a license for that, like a truck driving license. You're brave for doing it. I know why you're doing it, less expensive. When are you planning to do this? Date, I mean. Just be safe. Glad you found a wax-balm that works for your lips. Glad you figured out the stress trigger. I was doing okay at the beginning of the week. Cuticles all healed. Felt good about that. Then things started to get more difficult--wanted to say, "unraveled". We had a hospital visit on Monday and I just was snappy with the staff there--not that they were doing anything to warrant such a reaction, it was just me. Fortunately, I realized my behavior was out of line. The clerk who was processing the intake forms said, "Just give me a chance." I then realized I wasn't really helping, and went to sit down and let Shabtai handle things himself--a smart move. On Monday or Tuesday, I was reading an interesting book by this medical doctor from the 1800s online. He talks about how bad tobacco and coffee and tea are. He said that these substances could sometimes aggravate existing sores. Well, just at the start of the holiday that pain I had in my backside had returned with a vengence, so I was in a bad mood--irritable. I decided that since I don't use any of these other stimulants, (I don't smoke--never have; only drink herbal tea), i might as well drop the coffee. I went cold turkey, and to be honest, I don't miss it. But maybe that's making me moody. I guess that will pass. Anyway, yesterday was the real trigger. We nhad another electrical problem and my regular electrician didn't answer when I tried him. Thought he might be on vacation for the holiday. so I called up telephone information, which has a list of people on-call and businesses on-call. So I asked for an electrician in our area. So far so good. Well, he showed up and diagnosed the problem. Then, after a lot of talking and so on, he told us what it would cost. More expensive than I could have imagined--much mmore, and here's the kicker--because I found him through the telephone information service--I have to pay for that. What I didn't know was that this specific service is like a telephone yellow pages. My feelings? Why is it every time I feel like I'[m just beginning to recover money-wise I'm zapped with enough huge outlay? Like finally coming up for air, only to be dumped again under a huge wave, like drowning. Plus, intense self-recrimination. Why couldn't I have just waited for our regular electrical guy to call? whichhe did, of course, later on. admittedly, a few hours later on. Why am I so quick? If i had just waited a bit, I might have saved us all this money. I still would have needed the electrical repairs, but it would have cost much less. Plus, Shabtai's tooth is bothering him and he needs to go to the dentist. More outlay. Result: started chewing the cuticles that had finally just been healed. Made a huge mess out of my left thumb. Finally bandaged it now when I got up. Also picked at other fingers on my left hand, but not as bad as the thumb. Realized the trigger and have since left them alone. Also I've been brooding a lot about what to do with myself. Realize I have nothing to do. Just wish I could find some way to be busy. Depressed about that. Tziporah
Tziporah
web: www.istillhavemylife.com
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
Avatar for nawleansdarlin
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-1999
Thu, 04-12-2012 - 10:18pm

Hi Tziporah,

Yes, I will be driving a moving van.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2007
Sat, 04-14-2012 - 4:19pm
Hi Karen, The Passover holiday's over. Looking back, it seems like it was pretty relaxing. The last two days certainly were. No phone calls, no emails, nothing to do but eat and relax. That's because the last two days are stricter in observance, so a lot of things one can usually do, one can't. Just like on the Sabbath--no emails, no phones, etc. You might think it's restraining, but in truth it's like a breath of fresh air. Disconnecting from everything. Cars don't go through our neighborhood either, for the same reason, and it's a pleasure to walk around unimpeded by cars, to breathe clean non-toxic air. Eat!--Oy did I eat! such good food, I definitely need a diet now. Shabtai said not to weigh myself until at least a week from now. Smart guy. lol. True, I did bite my cuticles and write now I'm chewing on a piece of skin while I write this. Somehow, it feels good/relaxing. Can't explain why. It just does. Anyway, maybe the relaxation just came because I didn't have to deal with all the money things. The crazy thing is: we rushed to get this electrical problem fixed, and it cost a lot of money--as I wrote you. It had to do with turning on the air conditioner whhen it's connected to a timer. In the end, of course, we didn't even use the thing. We were going to use it because the weather forecast was for very hot weather during the last days of the holiday, but in the end it was pretty cool and not necessary. Which means, of course, I could have postponed the whole repair until after the holiday and could have saved myself a lot of money. I get that way sometimes--do things impulsively and then regret it because if I had just thought a little more, been a little slower in reacting, I could have saved money. This has happened before with repairs. I guess I was afraid that if we didn't have it fixed before the holiday, Shabtai would be upset. and especially now, the heat drives him crazy because of that dressing stuff on his feet. It's very uncomfortable. Much worse than wearing any stockings, as it is a layered kind of dressing--as I told you. Like you, I also don't wear stockings in the heat, but I do put on these knee socks, because in the religious community going bearfoot is frowned upon. I don't mind knee socks because the stockings only bother me in the upper thigh area. As long as that's cool, I'm okay. Funny, Shabtai isn't the kind of guy who's a tyrant, so my thinking he'd be upset was also an over-reaction. He might have been a little upset, but he wouldn't have been hostile or anything like that. It is just my imagination--an imaginary fear that he would be angry/upset. In fact, after the thing was repaired and he knew how much it cost, he said that perhaps "it's all for the good"--that perhaps this electrician, whom we had never used before, spotted a mechanical/electrical problem others had neglected or overlooked. Jelly beans. I love them too. Probably could eat a whole box of them if I had some. Ditto for popcorn. Giving up coffee has been relatively easy. Perhaps because I never even drank it until my twenties. I wish I could apply the same resolution and determination to my other habits. I thought about working on a health habit each week--adding a new one each week. Anyway, I have had a bit of coffee, usually a sup from Shabtai's cup--we often share the same cup--he drinks first and then I finish what's left. They now say chocolate is healthy and I know there's caffeine in chocolate. I eat chocolate sometimes. I don't know why it is, but if I'm constipated and eat chocolate, I get the reaction I want within a day or two. So I don't know if I could be called a complete caffeine-quit person. But definitely much less than before. I hope you're right, that things will turn around for both of us real soon. Tziporah
Tziporah
web: www.istillhavemylife.com
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
Avatar for nawleansdarlin
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-1999
Sun, 04-22-2012 - 11:52pm

Hi Tziporah,

Yesterday a very scary and strange thing happened to me.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2007
Mon, 04-23-2012 - 4:22am
Hi Everybody, Really quite depressed right now. Can't seem to shake it off. Cuticles on my fingers are really quite healed. Have been trying hard not to drink coffee--occasionally have a small sup but the more I don't have it, the more I don't want it. So I should feel good about these accomplishments, right? Right. Except yesterday, opened my email box first thing in the morning--maybe a mistake--and found I had a notice from the bank--back in the red again! Then we got a note from the sick fund that our first reimbursement request for the cost of the dressings my husband has to put on his feet was denied. The physiotherapist, who was here yesterday, said we are really entitled to it, but in order to get it, you have to fight for it. She sent me a fax which states I am--we are, entitled to it. After the email note from the bank, got angry with my husband for withdrawing some more when I thought it better not to. My depression put him into a depression. In the afternoon, (I have to explain that Sunday is a regular workday in Israel. Saturday is the day off), heard from the social security service that a nurse is coming to interview me on Wednesday. But as yet, no nurse has showed up to interview Shabtai. Maybe this nurse will interview both of us, but knowing how the "red tape" is here, I have my doubts. Anyway, Shabtai said that he viewed this thing about the nurse coming as a good sign--maybe the beginning of our attempt to get an increase in social security will finally be taking off. I continue to be pessimistic. I've lost faith in any kind of reimbursement from any of the agencies---even if we are entitled to it. Shabtai said: "if you keep predicting the worst, the worst will happen. If you can express optimism, maybe then that's what will happen." I know he's right, but I'm so down right now. Literally spent most of yesterday in bed just sleeping. It's amazing how much you can sleep when you're depressed. At least when you're sleeping, you can forget about all of it. Just feel like I'm failing in everything. Bored to death. Know I should get out of the house. Still stuck on what I should do with myself. Tziporah
Tziporah
web: www.istillhavemylife.com
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
Avatar for nawleansdarlin
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-1999
Mon, 04-23-2012 - 11:58am

Hi Tziporah,

I'm sorry to hear that you are so down right now.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2007
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 5:01pm
Hi Karen, Replying to your message, but not in the order in which you wrote it. Thanks for the explanation about your "name" being in your graphic. Happy 24th. and many more. Would you believe it? In all the time you and I have been writing each other, you never mentioned the names of your husband or son, so I have no idea who Mike is. Who is he? lol. As for dry skin--here's a tip that works. When you're bathing, if you take a bath, put some baby oil into the tub. Really softens up the skin. If showering is your style, fill a basin with warm water and baby oil and let your feet sit in it for about five-ten minutes. Shabtai's feet are often very dry. Whole pieces of skin come off. His doc told us this tip and it works. For chapped hands, put hand cream on and then gloves and sleep with them on. I learned that one on the si msb. Vitamin E oil works for dry skin. My cuticles are getting better, thanks to the gloves treatment. I hate packing and unpacking. Don't know which is worse. I thinking packing up to move--deciding what to keep and what to discard. Of course, unpacking is no fun either, so you have my sympathy. Good luck on the upcoming moving van journey. Drive safe and take frequent breaks. Still managing without coffee--not totally, though. Some days and go without it. Other days have it in the morning and that's all. As for the depression and feeling so down, I've started writing on the depression msb. At first, to be honest, was a bit put off. Everyone there sounded just like me--one "I'm feeling hopeless and down" story after another. But overcame the resistance and posted an entry. Actually, people there sound quite nice and supportive, so I'll be writing there also. I think depression-related stuff fits better on that board than on a board dedicated to anxiety, even though people here do write about depression. After all, depression and anxiety overlap. It's just a question of which nood is more dominant. Right now, it's definitely the depression. Yesterday slept most of the day, just like I did on Sunday. But overcame the humilition and took more out of my savings to put into the bank to cover the minus. Every time I do that, I feel like a failure because i'm not working. Have to go to the sick fund and have a fight with them about getting reimbursement for the dressings. That stuff cost a few hundred dollars to get. Shabtai's physio gave us a sheet that states we are entitled to it, but you know how it is--you have to pound tables to get anything. Meantime, tomorrow a nurse is supposed to come from the social security service to interview me. Last month we talked to a social worker at our municiplaity. She's actually very good and supportive. Most social workers, unfortunately, I have found to be jerks, but I've met a few who are really great. She's in that class, thank goodness. Anyway, she suggested that Shabtai and I make separate applications to the social security service for financial help. Shatai< who already receives something, in order to upgrade his status following the accident; me, to get on their payroll. So this nurse, who called the other day, said she wanted to come to interview ME, not my husband. Got that? Yo9u'd figure that if they're already coming, why not take care of both of us at the same time. But she didn't even mention my husband until just before she hung up and asked if he'[ll be at home. So I can't say for sure whether my assumption is correct. My husband said to be optimistic--maybe this is the start of things turning around. As for myself, wit my depressive tendencies, and having been rebuffed already by the medical system, I'm not so optimistic. Shabtai says, "what you prophesy is what you get." if you think positive, it will be positive. If you think negative, the outcome will be negative. He's always been more positive minded than me. I know this principle and it is a sound one, but right now I'm really very doubtful about anything. Did I tell you the pain in my butt has come back? Probably did. Well, my request for an ultrasound was rejected because the sick fund said it wasn't in their "health basket." meaning: if I want it, do it yourself privately. Right. Like I have that kind of money. In any event, decided I'll tell the nurse about it. Maybe then the social security will make a request for that exam on my application and I'll be able to get the thing done. Still, even if it turns out that fistula thing has come back, which I think it has, I don't know what I'll do about getting it surgically removed. This time it's deeper inside the rectal area, not on the surface like last time. If I have to stay in the hospital, what about Shabtai? On Sunday, we're supposed to go to the orthopedic shop where his walking device is being built. We also have another appointment in the hospital on Monday for them to check the sores on his feet. They're improving. He's hopeful they'll give him the okay for the operation. I don't think they're quite ready for that, but there has been improvement. Next week, we also have an important interview with someone who is connected to the health ministry. The orthopedic shop where we originally went--one of the guys there knows this doc who's connected to the health ministry and said he'll go with us in an attempt to get them to pay for this device they're constructing for him. Plus, if that wasn't enough, we're supposed to return the wheelchair we've been using for the last half year to the organization that loaned it to us. A friend called us today and told us how we can get it lent to us for another half-year. Hope they won't give us a hassle. The way he suggested is to get someone else to deposit a check--not to use the same check used last time. I think last time it was Shabtai who deposited a check as colateral, so this time I'll try it with my check. Signing off for now. I'll keep you informed. Tziporah
Tziporah
web: www.istillhavemylife.com
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
Avatar for nawleansdarlin
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-1999
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 9:16pm

Oh Tziporah,

Don't even get me started on social workers in general.

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Avatar for nawleansdarlin
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-1999
Re: Belated Welcome, Shavtay2007
Wed, 09-12-2012 - 7:46pm

Hello my old friend!

I disappeared for far too long.  I was very very sick.  I was in ICU multiple times.  I wrote about it in another thread titled I'm back!  I'm just glad I found someone who could fix my problem at long last.  I really thought I was going to die.  I'll talk about that later.  

One of my real-life heroes is Mother Teresa.  I think she was amazing.  To answer your questions.  "Karen, have another Catholic-religion question for you. Remember way back when you explained to me about why nuns where black habits? to symbolize their "widowhood".? Well, in one of the Chicken Soup For The Souls series, there was this comment by Mother Theresa about being "married to Jesus." I know that that's what nuns think. Question: how can they be "married" and "widows" at the same time?"   Nuns wear the habits because the habits symbolized widowhood in the lay people around them.  At that point in history things were rough and so they donned the habits to not be bothered by men.  Nuns wear a wedding ring, a plain gold band.  They are considered to be married.  It has always confused me.  How many wives does Jesus have?  Multiple wives is not a part of the Catholic religion and while men were expected to take in their brother's widows, there is no mention, to my knowledge, of these men marrying their brother's widow.   "Question: If nuns are supposedly married to him, then what are priests considered to be? married or not, and if so, to whom?"  Priests are celebrate and cannot marry.  The do not wear a wedding band.  To my knowledge they are married to Catholicism, whatever that means.  This is why I have a problem with Catholicism in general, it's too confusing.  How can one beleive in something that one doesn't even understand?  I really need a diagram, some sort of family tree thing.  It baffles me.

Did you get the social security or sick fund money?   Along the same lines, my husband was approved for Social Security Disability and now we will be getting some money in.  Yay!

I really have a lot of catching up to do.  I will be back and I can promise that.  I am feeling much better.  I'm still weak but that will improve as I am more able to get around.  I had to be weaned from steroids and pain meds.  I was on some pretty powerful stuff.  

I hope this finds you well.

Karen

 

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