Belated Welcome, Shavtay2007
Find a Conversation
Belated Welcome, Shavtay2007
| Tue, 03-20-2007 - 10:32am |
Hi Tziporah,
I am so sorry that this is such a belated welcome to you. I've been absent from the board for nearly a month - so many things have been happening in my life that it was difficult to also come here. The good news is that life has somewhat calmed down (but I'm still crossing my fingers and my toes), which means that I'm back on iVillage.
I am so very happy to see you here, participating and sharing in our conversations! I hope that we'll get to know each other better in the coming weeks.
Welcome again!
(PS: I love the sound of your name!)

Please visit these other great message boards:
Cranio-Facial Abnormalities
In Vitro (IVF)


Pages
cl of the Self-Injury
after doing the ivillage search on anger management, i applied a google search and came up with support groups on other websites, such as:
dailystrength.org, which is a very comprehensive website. if i remember correctly, they also have a msb for si.
again, please tell me how to erase the message which i wrote in the wrong box yesterday.
thanks.
tziporah
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
web: www.istillhavemylife.com
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
cl of the Self-Injury
Hi Amanda,
one less thing to worry about--trying to erase a wrongly placed message.
in the meantime, i made a lot of progress with the autobiography for my website, after obsessing about it for almost two months!
i told the web designer to nudge me every week, or else i'll never finish anything.
feeling really good right now. a lot accomplished this week personally and a lot accomplished by the women i'm coaching. very satisfying.
got another therapy session coming up today. (tremble). expect more deep work. by the time you recover from the last treatment, you're scheduled for the next. that's the way it is, i guess--ripped up, then left to recover and heal. and then, the whole process starts over again. ripped up and left to recover and heal. over and over. i have two sessions per week. mondays and thursdays. just enough time to go through this full cycle. not complaining--just stating the way it is.sometimes the only thing that keeps me going through it is the fact that my rabbi said i need it. i respect him too much not to comply. i know he has my best interests at heart.
cuticles not perfect, but decent enough.
i wanted to get that in shape before my ritual immersion, which is Friday night. satisfied enough that it will be okay for that. it is very humiliating to have to go through that with ripped up fingers.
tziporah
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
web: www.istillhavemylife.com
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
cl of the Self-Injury
Hello, Everyone,
a lot has happened since i last wrote. cannot believe it is only a month!
feels so much longer!
first, most important, Shabtai got very sick and had to be hospitalized during the Passover week. that was last week, April 10. three days in the hospital and i was mentally and physically exhausted.
he is recovering very slowly, which has me worried and makes him depressed, and a lot of chronic health issues, a consequence of his kidney transplant, are plaguing him. he is usually out of the house a lot, involved in his normal activities, and now he just spends most of the time resting in bed. being away from his normal activities is also depressing to him. this is going to be a long haul.
in other news, i also found out i suffered a big financial setback and as a result we had to decide to stop having Sabbath guests from seminaries. just cannot afford it. regulars on this board will know that was central in our home.
i don't think i expected this loss to be so impacting on my emotions. sometimes the seminary girls got on my nerves, they are very different from what we were like when we were in sem, but then, that was 30 years ago. still, it was good for me. it got me out of the house, forced me to interact with others--all good for fighting the chronic depression.
since this decision was made, most sem girls went back to the States for the Passover holiday. they will be back this week or next and then i will have to tell them.
very depressing. this was a major fixture of our lives.
of course, the financial loss itself was severe enough and we have had to slash expenses in many areas, just like everybody else.i am not complaining about it, just stating how this has affected me emotionally and mentally.
plus, my recovery from the eye surgries has been much harder than was anticipated. i had the tear ducts in each eye cleaned out and expanded--two operations. for those who may recall, after the first attack i had a very bad bronchitis which almost landed me in the hospital. that was in Jan.
after the second treatment, i came down with a very severe multiple infection--in my eyes, nose, and right ear. the earache pain was excruciating--no exaggeration and i found my right ear totally blocked.
getting good medical help has been hard because of the holiday break.
the surgeon was supposed to take out the drain in my eyes on March 31. he couldn't do it--just to infected. everything infected. i also have a drain in my nose which he couldn't even start to work on either. just too infected.
well, i have been trying to regain my health. today i am supposed to see him again. hopefully, he will be able to take the drains out and i will be through with this thing. but am not certain--still have a stuffed nose and goppy eyes.
as a result of all this, i also have to go for a hearing test in May. gradually, i have regained some hearing, but it is not like it was before.
as a blind person, i depend greatly on my hearing and if the functioning in one ear is permanently ruined it will be an adjustment i will have to make. it just does not feel right--disorienting.
plus--i have been trying to keep my spirits up about being able to start this coaching business, really get it going. but with the economy, i keep having doubts. what made me ever think i could really do this? i must have been dreaming.
my sleep cycle is totally haywire. the only time i got a full night's sleep was when Shabtai was in the hospital--probably from sheer exhaustion.
usually, it's a few hours of deep sleep and then being totally awake. today i have been up since 3am.
my t. says that if this carries on it will have dangerous long-term implications--not dangerous, but it will have a long-term effect.
i have thought of going to a sleep disorder clinic but am still going to give it some time.
i'm also getting depressed about my weight gain. since i have been off the meds, i have lost a little weight. but i really need to get into some regimen. just one more thing to do. my t. says i am feeling very overwhelmed, everything hitting me all at once. he says to start with one thing, just focus on it, and proceed from there.
i still do not want to go back on meds.
i have two requests. if anyone can help out, i'd appreciate it.
during college, 1973-74, i was exploring other religions. this is a long story, too long for this post. anyway, i read some Christian books, among them, writings by Catherine Marshall, whom i really liked.
i was thinking about her book, Beyond Ourselves, and particularly the story about Tess. i think this story is in the chapter on: prayers that make dreams come true. in this story, the woman, Tess, works on herself. she changes herself, losing weight, new social life, that kind of thing.
does anyone here know this story?
I am writing about it here because i know that some of the women here are involved in the church.
of course, now i am not, and do not plan to be going back to church, as I am jewish, but i have beenthinking about that story a lot and wanted to try to recall it, or find out exactly what it was about. something keeps making me think about it. perhaps there is a message in it for me.
the other thing is:
in May, i will be starting supervised coaching in coaching school. this involves coaching someone for 15 minutes over a six-week period on the phone and then being evaluated by an instructor.
anyone who wanted to do it would have to call into a certain phone number at a preset time, and then we would engage in coaching, with myself being the coach, and this individual being the client.
i am a life coach who works with women on issues that affect them.
the classes start on Monday, May 4 and continue every Monday and Wednesday till mid-June. the time for the course is: 4pm-5:30pm New York time.
individuals would only have to be available for the specific 15-minute time slot, not the full ninety minutes. but they need to be punctual and sure they can commit.
this is a great opportunity for anyone who would like to try life coaching for free and work on a specific issue in their lives.
if you are interested,please let me know asap.
anyone can commit for a one-time thing or for several sessions.
of course, we will connect to talk about it beforehand so there will be time to prepare.
well, i'm trying to get back on track. at least my si has been better, nothing really major with little nail-picking,and no hair-cutting or picking the skin on my heels. this time, last year,i was really cutting my hair a lot. from Passover, for about fifty days, until the next major Jewish holiday, people are supposed to abstain from hair cutting. i couldn't do it. just could not resist. i've looked at my hair, touched it, that is, been tempted to try to cut it, but have so far resisted.
some fingers are sore, taking slow to heal, but i am not picking at new ones.
Tziporah
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
web: www.istillhavemylife.com
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
Hi!
Gosh, so much to have happened, no wonder you're feeling a little overwhelmed!
www.rainbowinspirations.co.uk
http://rainbowinspired.livejournal.com/
cl of the Self-Injury
I got the drains taken out today. my eye is a little teary now, but the doc said it would be irritated. i feel better at least in my nose--no more drain in my nostrils. after he took it out, it took me a minute to get used the new situation--nose with no drain in it--a very funny sensation for the first minute.
i was really nervous about the treatment, thought it would be painful, though it was not. sat there in the waiting room examining all my fingers. sores on all fingers on right hand, except for middle finger. left hand a little better, but some rough skin on cuticles. i thought: i could i have written that message this morning, about si improvement? admittedly, i did some cuticle picking while waiting for my turn in the office. so maybe when i wrote the message this morning i was accurate. but the situation has changed since then.
Tziporah
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
web: www.istillhavemylife.com
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
I had a coaching session with my coach tonight. she's a yoga teacher. she also suggested meditation. she also said my highest priority right now needs to be getting the rest i need.
i feel like i have to finish coaching school--meet the Sept. graduation deadline. otherwise, won't be able to graduate till Dec.
maybe i am pushing myself too hard.
we decided that during the coming week i will try to do more meditation and then re-evaluate things.
i feel totally exhausted right now.
am going to go to bed.
Tziporah
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
web: www.istillhavemylife.com
blog: tziporahwishky.livejournal.com
Pages