Feeling like a loose cannon...(m)--trigs

Avatar for sunshineydays
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Feeling like a loose cannon...(m)--trigs
4
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 5:57pm
Hi all,

I am having a really difficult time today. I was gone for the last 5 days or so on vacation. I came home last nite and today went to work for a bit (grading papers & doing report cards). Well, the first thing that threw me off was that all the lights are off, which have been off on weekends to conserve electricity and money. Today, though, it really freaked me out. I felt very panicky, teary, nauseous. I didn't feel safe, yet a part of me does feel safe there. It was overwhelming. I did stay b/c once i got to my classroom, I turned on the lights, of course. While I was at school today, I felt like any little thing that happened (conversations with people, reading an e-mail, etc) sent me reeling. I would feel like I could cry. That alone was frustrating. So, I came home this afternoon & have been trying to calm myself down. Then I spoke with my stepmother--she and my dad are divorcing and they had a hearing today to get a temporary agreement made about money & my sister (who is 17). I am having thoughts that are not welcome and it's scary (F.Y.I. I'm not suicidal...just didn't want to freak anyone out). My T is gone for the weekend, so I can't call her. I know I can call hotlines and such, but that just doesn't feel right either. So, I decided to post. Maybe just writing it will help me release some of the confusing feelings I'm feeling.

Thanks for reading, Stacy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 6:36pm
I'm glad you posted. Here's an idea for you to help you get through this emotional rough patch: Try some self-affirmations. Say whatever works for you. One thing I do is tell myself, "I'm all right. I'm safe. This feeling will pass." Something like that. I try to ground myself in the present by very intentionally cataloguing everything around me. The dog is here. The sun is shining. I am breathing in. I am breathing out. That helps me get rid of the panicky feelings when they get really bad.

(((hugs)))

Avatar for sunshineydays
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 03-29-2003 - 1:29am
Thanks for the great idea...I really appreciate it and I'm going to try that. Stacy
Avatar for ateachersangel
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 03-29-2003 - 9:31am
Hi Stac. I really don't have anything helpful to offer, but I just wanted to let you know I hope you feel better soon. I hope you are able to find comfort this weekend.

Becky

Avatar for sunshineydays
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 03-29-2003 - 1:33pm
Thanks, Becky. I did take a walk today, which helped some. I'm going to try and do some things for me today. Hopefully that will help. I appreciate your support! Stacy