QOTW: Inner Child Work

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Registered: 03-21-2003
QOTW: Inner Child Work
5
Wed, 05-14-2003 - 11:40am
Many people, along the path of healing, do inner child work. Have you done any inner child work? Thought about it? Feel an aversion to it? Love it? Please share your feelings and experience about inner child work.
Avatar for opal45
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Registered: 04-15-2003
Wed, 05-14-2003 - 2:43pm
Adore it. Swear by it!
**gentle hugs**

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Registered: 05-14-2003
Wed, 05-14-2003 - 7:19pm
Inner Child work has been a big part of my healing therapy, and it has been a very positive experience. Doing the dominant/nondominant writing has been the best way to not only address feelings, but to feel resolution to them. Once I figured out when the child inside was screaming for attention and then did the writing, using my dominant hand as a way to reassure her that I am taking care of her, those particular feelings have not resurfaced needing attention. I've found this to be so effective. The child is heard and validated, reassured, and trusts that I can take care of her.

I'm glad my therapist believes in Inner Child work. This has been a great way to be in touch with myself.

Heidi

HeidiRose

co-cl, Sexual Abuse Healing Board

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Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 05-14-2003 - 10:52pm
I am just starting to try "inner child work". Bought a book, started reading and talking to my therapist about it. Don't know how, don't understand how it's supposed to work, but at this point, I'm going on faith.

Deb

PS. Non-dominant hand writing just ripps my guts out, I've only done it once.

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Registered: 05-14-2003
Wed, 05-14-2003 - 11:31pm
Hang in there with it; it really does work. There are times that it is extremely painful, but part of healing is allowing the feelings and the reasons they are there to come out rather than push them away, as so many of us have done for so long.

The most incredible thing I found with the d/nd handwriting is that when writing as a child with my nondominant hand, I really felt like I was that child again. I could picture things more clearly, and feel what it was like to be the age I was addressing. When I do n/nd writing, the nondominant writes with a pink marker, because I loved pink and markers were "grownup" things. That way it is treat for my Inner Child, plus she is being listened to and told that she is precious and cared about.

One of the most fun things I've done with Inner Child work is indulging in things that I loved. This may sound silly, but I ADORED Disney's Sleeping Beauty. The movie was in the theaters when I was 4 (about the same time I was violated) and I was completely smitten! One night after I started SA therapy when things were really hard and I had fears and anxieties hitting me from all sides, I got out a Sleeping Beauty doll that I have had for about five years but never took out of the box. Was saving it for a collector's shelf when we get a bigger house. I decided it was time to bring her out--I brushed her hair and snuggled with her, then she sat here on my computer desk while I journaled. Another night before that I watched our Sleeping Beauty video and ate ice cream. Both of these nights were ones where I found myself alone for the night because hubby was working and both kids ended up at sleepovers, so I was just taking care of ME--no one else. Like I said, might sound silly but it really helped me connect.

One gal who my counselor worked with bought a tea set, and her husband came home to her having a tea party. She asked him to play with her, and he wanted to know what they got to do afterward! LOL Some people buy a teddy bear to snuggle with or sleep with. Just try to think of things that you loved when you were a child, or something that you always wanted but never had, and then treat yourself. It can also be something like going for bike rides if that was something that made you feel good.

My counselor said that Inner Child work can be one of the most enjoyable aspects of therapy, and I have found that to be true! It's a way of reconnecting with that child inside of you who feels neglected, and of nurturing her. As she trusts you more she will eventually feel comfortable sharing more about her with you.

HeidiRose

co-cl, Sexual Abuse Healing Board

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Registered: 03-21-2003
Thu, 05-15-2003 - 1:28am
My feelings about inner child work are mixed. When I have done it, it feels so incredibly healing. But I also sometimes feel foolish doing it, and I make fun of it (in my mind, not out loud). I know this is self-sabotaging, but these are the thoughts that appear. On Mother's Day, I sat down to write in my journal. I planned on doing something creative, something fun, but what came out instead was a very long visualization of my inner child and my adult self going into the house I grew up in and rescuing her. I read it to my AMAC group on Tuesday, and I cried and cried. My group cried along with me. I felt as if this journal entry had been a long time in the coming. I realized that I have a lot of guilt about not wanting to do the inner child work, because I feel like I'm abandoning that child just as she was before. I think I'm really turning a corner with it, though. For me to read that to my group was a big step for me.