Custody battles are so ugly. I hope your parents find out where the girls are. I'm so glad your dad has come around so well. I'm glad that's happened. :)
Take care on bedrest. It's best to leave it to your dad so you can focus on yourself and your baby. Cutting out the stress can only help things.
Just thought I'd let you know about an online support organization for moms on bedrest. www.sidelines.org.
Hi again Rae,
I'm glad your mom came over to help you. Little ones can be so overwelming sometimes. (2 little neices here). I'm sure that gave you some much needed rest, and maybe an eye opener to a good family life.
Please don't take this the wrong way, but IMHO, I can't blame your SIL for cutting the girls off from the biofamily. I'm assuming she cares for these girls. And you must see it from her eyes as well...it was their biodad that hurt them...at least some of biofamily is threatening to take the girls while the person who hurt them is living with said biofamily members. IF it was my neice(s) in that position, I wouldn't want any communication either when it seems the abuser is being believed/harbored.
Have you tried to explain to your sil in email/phone message that you don't want them to live with their abuser? she might be more willing to communicate if she knows.
I wish you and your family the best of luck,
Well, I made some progress with my mom yesterday. I was having a really really bad pregnancy day. I simply couldn't care for my 1 yr old it was so bad. I called my mom at work and asked her to come over after work until bedtime. Surprisingly she came. She kept asking me if I have spoken to the girls stepmother. Nope, she won't return my calls or emails or apparently anyone elses. This is making my mom very nervous. We figure she is cutting the girls off from their entire biofamily at the advice of a stupid detective. I get that this man wants to put the squeeze on Mike but I disagree with this method. My mom is worried. I pointed out that the longer it takes to get Mike out the worse it is going to be for the girls. How they must feel right now. She asked me for some help finding housing. Personally, I think Mike should just do it on his own, nobody should help him. BUT I said I would look. Only because it would be for the greater good of many other people. She admitted that she just doesn't know what to do or how to do it. I kept reiterating how not good it is that my SIL is cutting us all off from the girls. Maybe fear and worry can be a good motivator for mom.
On another plus side, she was really amazed at my kids. She hasn't spent much time with htem in the last months. She couldn't believe how much the baby has changed. I could see that visibly shaking her. She needed to see "normal" life and see what she is missing.
Actually, the 14 yr old is NOT happy. She wants her whole family together. I kinda don't blame her. Here is a quick rundown of their lives
together as a fam (mom, dad, older half sibs, younger sib)
Older half sibs taken away by maternal gma and biodad.
Moved in with paternal gparents
Moved out into a trailer
Trailer burned down, moved in with Paternal gparents
mom and dad split, mom took girls and disappeared for 9 months. Girls were 4 and 5
Mom moved 3 times, causing older one to switch kindergartens 3 times.
Moms new fil molests both girls
mom drops girls off for a 3 day visit in Jan (girls were 5 and 6) and doesn't come back or call for 3 Months!
Paternal gparents get emergency custody and get older one in school, younger one in preschool.
2 years later custody is voluntarily given back to dad and they move in with him and stepmom and sibs
New older halfsib enters the pic (dads second of 5 biokids)
They all move 3 times, switching schools each time
Stepmom kicks dad out, who nearly ODS on otcs and whiskey. While dad is in hospital, gma has a stroke and stepmom kicks girls out too.
Girls and dad move back in with paternal gparents--again and switch schools---again
year later stepmom and dad make up and they move--again
Biomom shows up and takes them to court for visitation. Denied.
Now dad has molested them and we are current.