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|Fri, 07-17-2009 - 7:21am|
I found an old friend online and she contacted me. It'll be great to see her again after all these years. We're both grandmas' now and we used to have sleepovers together.
However it gets me thinking about how lonely i really am. I've always hated not being a part of my family of origin. I moved and neither of use tries very hard to keep in touch. I also joined my family late in life. My mother took me away as a baby and brought me back as a preteen. First she left me with my dad then she left me again by dying. He abused me from age 11 to 17.
Anyway the point is i have no family of my own to relying on. I'm not sure why but I don't have any close friends either. I have lots of acquaintances. I've had friends but they never last. Sometimes my fault sometimes theirs.
I don't feel loved and supported by my husband. Then again i don't ask for what i need either. I can't talk to him. I can talk to my children but my daughter has her own problems and doesn't need mine.
So here i sit crying that I'm so alone and not knowing what to do about it.