I'm afraid to date anymore

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2009
I'm afraid to date anymore
Mon, 10-12-2009 - 4:32pm
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2009
Wed, 10-21-2009 - 10:21pm

dear "I'm afraid to date anyone",

I write you because I have been there. Almost the same story in fact, I was dating a guy who raped me after telling him no. I'm sure via a date rape drug as well. It left me feeling the same way. I, to this day, have trust issues but I met the most amazing man who loves me and whom I adore. I cry writing this to you because he gave me my life back. He is the love of my life and my hero. I warn you though that it may take a long time (it did for me) but when it happens (as it will) it will change your life. He will adore you and remind you of a time of innocence and trust in your life. Maybe you will never trust anyone again (I don't trust men) but you will trust him. That is all that matters. I hope that you find him soon because he will help you heal. My prayers are with you.

Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001
Sat, 10-17-2009 - 3:43pm
My heart goes out to you.
It is hard and it may take a while for you to trust again.
Go with your gut instincts.
I feel the same way you do...and it's sad that because of bad experiences we build our walls up in order not to get hurt yet again.
It may be you do need to take a break from the dating scene...give yourself some time.
If you could do you think you would try counselling again?
Have you checked with a sexual assualt center in your area locally that might help?
This wasn't your fault...it was his.
I can empathize with you because after I broke up with my abusive ex I found myself feeling anyone I met was ONLY seemingly interested in ONE thing...
I want someone to love me for who I am and not interested in just that...sometimes like another poster said we may have to kiss a lot of frogs before we meet our prince.
Just know you aren't alone in feeling like this.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2008
Thu, 10-15-2009 - 4:31pm