Do you feel you were...

Avatar for opal45
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Do you feel you were...
Wed, 12-09-2009 - 7:10am
I hope this doesn't offend anyone but I'm just curious. Do you feel you were partially responsible for your abuse? I'm asking b/c
**gentle hugs**

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2008
Wed, 12-09-2009 - 7:09pm

I am not offended by your question.

Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001
Wed, 12-09-2009 - 11:46pm
This is a really good question.
Sometimes I think I might have "blamed" myself for an assault that happened in adulthood but in ALL honesty I know and believe it wasn't my fault EVER.
I was abused by someone when I was around 7 and actually it may have been even earlier but it went on until I was about 10.
Right now I am dealing with some anger issues resulting from feelings of frustration over the protection of the is just so wrong and totally unacceptable.
Just my two cents worth and sorry for venting but felt like I had to.
I hate how it is minimized what we have went through.
This is never "our fault".
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2008
Fri, 12-11-2009 - 1:35pm
I'm not offended in the least by your question.



iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2000
Fri, 12-11-2009 - 4:11pm

Children always seem to blame themselves when something bad happens in the family and that includes them being abused. Of course I blamed myself. I thought I was evil even when I had no memory of the abuse. I just knew I was bad and evil and destroyed everyone's lives. That is why I hurt myself, tried to kill myself and was so depressed all the time. I was bad....period. And then when my mother died(37 years ago today) my family and a former psychiatrist actually told me that I killed her with all the stress I put on her. That stress caused her cancer.

To this day I fight that very deep feeling and I always will. Doesn't help when everyone agrees with your delusion(even a shrink).

gentle hugs..............Jenny

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2008
Tue, 12-15-2009 - 3:13am
i am not offended.