Finding your passion?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2002
Finding your passion?
14
Fri, 02-11-2005 - 10:49am

Hello there,

I am searching for some advice about finding your passion in life and would like to learn from the experiences of people out there who have found work that they love. I've posted this message on a couple of the "work" boards, so if you've seen this before, I apologize! I got a few responses, but I thought this might be the right board to find passionate people who are in tune with their desires.

So, as a background, I am 26 years-old and have been working full-time since I graduated from college 5 years ago. Entering the workforce was a huge challenge for me since I loved being in school and found myself resisting the need to get a job right after I graduated. My first real job experience was working as a media buyer for an ad agency, which I after a year of struggling to be even remotely successful, I realized the role did not utilize my talents or interests. After one year I was laid off, and it was the best thing that could have happened to me.

Since then I’ve done a variety of jobs, including an administrative role at a university, which was not only terribly boring, but demeaning as well since I didn't receive any respect from my boss or co-workers. I was the girl who got dumped on with all of the grunt work. I left that job at the advice of my boss since he knew I was completely unhappy. To pay the bills I started nannying, which was a refreshing change of pace. I truly enjoyed being creative again with the children and I liked being out of an office environment. I found that I ate better and got in terrific shape from running after two four-year-old boys all day. People constantly commented on how great I looked (meaning happy, healthy, relaxed). Despite my initial bliss, after several months, I started to get bored again and felt the nagging tug of the corporate world on my sleeve (maybe it was my parents hounding me to get a real job, after all they did pay a bundle for my education). I picked up a part-time internship with an academic publisher in sales and although I didn’t love being on the sales force, I did enjoy working with books since reading and writing are a passion of mine. Putting two and two together, I decided that this was my calling, only I wanted to produce the product, not sell it, so I got a job in the editorial department at an academic publisher. My first year and a half was challenging and somewhat fun, but I started to grow out of the role and since the pay stinks in this industry, I was forced to change jobs. I took a my new position at a competing publisher in order to move up, but it is leaving me jaded, bored out of my mind, and searching for something new after only eight months.

I’m frustrated that with all of the soul searching I have done, I’ve only landed back at a boring desk job where I feel lazy and uninspired about succeeding. I know that my hidden passion is lying somewhere deep inside of me, only I feel overwhelmed at the thought of finding out what it is. I have an inkling that I’d like to do something with education/books/learning, but I want to be more creative in my work and I'm afraid of making another bad move. I think ultimately, I’d like to be the one writing the books, not managing their production schedules and I've actually started writing again as a result of my experience. Maybe someday I'll be published, but what do I do until then? My role in publishing is turning out to be one as a paper pushing monkey, and the next position on the totem pole calls for more of the same. I’ve noticed that I’m not succeeding in the corporate world at all and find the lifestyle oppressive, only I am afraid of break out of it and do something unconventional. Does anyone have some advice on how I can move beyond this obstacle?

Thanks for reading!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 02-11-2005 - 11:27am

(((Hugs))) Sully! I can totally relate. I'm in my mid-30's now and still haven't figured out what I want to do when I grow up. I've done waitressing, retail, manicuring, taught preschool, done daycare, stayed home with my own kids... and still nothing just jumps out at me as 'wow! THAT's what I want to do!' Not even a hint. This has actually been a big focus of my attention in the last few months. I even commented to a friend that I felt like I was having a mid-life crisis! LOL

I'm afraid I don't really have any advice. I'm still searching for answers myself. One thing I AM doing is rereading Simple Abundance by Sarah Ban Breathnach. It's a daily meditation book that she wrote while she was going through a similar phase in her life. I also recommend her other books: Something More: Excavating Your Authentic Self, and Romancing the Ordinary.

Good luck! I hope we both find what we're looking for!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2004
Fri, 02-11-2005 - 12:40pm

Hi Sullylark…

Oh the educational market! I have been working for an educational publishing company for the past 17 years. Surprises me because I have always thought I had the attention span of a gnat. At 37 I cannot believe I have worked nearly half my life there. I recently realized that I have pretty much been married to the job and am no longer fulfilled there. In addition the company has been in extreme turmoil…people are very unhappy there. It has been a very painful shift for me and I feel a bit lost. So…I am searching for what I guess you could say is my calling. Thing is…I have a feeling it is no longer in this field, or ever really was. The difficult part is that just because I have excelled at the many jobs I have held at the company, it does not necessarily mean that any of them touched my soul.

I, like Ginger, have been meditating on it. Also, I have been preparing the other areas of my life for the transition. Journaling is helping me figure out some things. I have spent time trying to figure out what makes me happy. Even going back to what made me happy as a child. A few books I have enjoyed are “Follow Your Bliss” & “Do What You Love, the Money Will Follow.” I am trying to work through the things that are blocking me…fear & lack of confidence being at the top. I realize I will probably have to take a considerable pay cut to follow my dream, but the joy will be the payoff. (oh…yes, I know our field pays very little anyways…lol)

I am sorry I couldn’t give you any real answers. It's wonderful that you are trying to figure this out now, instead of waiting until 37 (like me) to start trying to figure it out...lol. I wish you all the best in your journey. Follow your heart and you will find it!

Blessings:)

 

"In short, all good things in life are wild and free."  ~Thoreau

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2002
Fri, 02-11-2005 - 2:55pm

Hello ltsdove,

It's always great to meet another publishing cronie, so I was excited to read your message. I'm curious to know what department you are currently working in? I'm in editorial and manage supplement material for collegiate textbooks. As you can guess, my next step is to start working on books, but I'm not convinced that I want to go there. It's funny because I made the move to get into this industry thinking that it would be a noble and rewarding profession, but because of all the B.S. I deal with on a daily basis, it's rare to see the positive impact of my work! Sometimes they'll let me out on campus where I'll meet profs who are excited about the products, and from those experiences I get a passing feeling of pride, but it only lasts so long.

Anyway, I find that my frustrations and the lack of creatvity in my job are getting in the way of enjoying my work. However, my reality is that I have to stick it out until I figure out my next move. As someone who is an established professional, do you have any advice? Again, I'm not sure what you do, but I wish I could continue to work on the product in a more creative way. I've considered developmental editing or doing more product development, but I'm not sure what it takes to do either job. I was also wondering if maybe a change in discipline would help. I'm naturally a humanities person, but I've only worked in the sciences, so my interests are not being tapped into. Anyway, it would be great to hear your experience!

Thanks again for your input!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2004
Fri, 02-11-2005 - 5:15pm
OOH!! I just LOVE those Sarah Ban Breathnach books! :-) I can't praise them enough! I'm reading Simple Abundance now, too, and I write my Gratitude List right in the book! :-D
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2004
Fri, 02-11-2005 - 5:17pm

Hi there, Sully! Don't have much time to write, but wanted to share that I feel for you-- I'm going through something of the same thing, not really sure what my passion in life is. I mean, I know what I'm passionate about, but not sure which of those I want to make my career. I'm 26, too, lol. ;-)


Hope we both find what we're looking for!


Have a great weekend,


~Victoria


PS-- try the Sarah Ban Breathnach books that GingerCookie suggested--I think they are great!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2004
Fri, 02-11-2005 - 6:10pm

Hi Sullylark...

I am going to post my reply over on the IHMJ board. I promise I'll get back to you, but it may be tomorrow. I look forward to talking more about this:)

Take Care.

 

"In short, all good things in life are wild and free."  ~Thoreau

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2004
Sun, 02-13-2005 - 12:21pm

Hi sullylark, I'm not sure if this is the kind of thing you are looking for but I have spent some time thinking about this very thing for quite a while now to incorporate into workshops I am hoping to some day run. (I know that running workshops along this line is my passion, but as yet have not found the confidence to do it!!) Unfortunately there is too much information for me to go into it in great detail so I am condesning it down.

You may already know this but if not firstly find out what kind of a learner you are. There are four basic types - activists, reflectors, experimenters or theorists. I'm sure there must be books out there somewhere that will help you decide which best fits you, if you aren't sure. Finding this out will help you to decide whether you want a job where you can think problems through step-by-step in a logical way (theorist), want to see how things work in practice (experimenter), where you can enjoy watching other people in action (reflector) or perhaps where you like being thrown in at the deep end (activist). There is of course much more to the type of learner you are than the brief examples I've given here.

Then think about your natural qualities and what you love to do most in your life. (This may not seem career orientated but it can help you to concentrate on what it is you really enjoy). In my workshops I would use: alertness, attentiveness, awareness, beauty, beliefs, centredness, commitment, confidence, compassion, consistency, communication, direction, enthusiasm, endurance, expressiveness, faith, freindliness, generosity, graciousness, guidance, health, honesty, humour, image, independence, insight, intention, intimacy, intuition, joy, laughter, leadership, love, nurturance, open-minded, peacefulness, patience, security, self-awareness, self-esteem, sensitivity, serenity, stability, vision, tolerance, trust, unconditional-love, understanding, wisdom, vitality.

Then think about your abilities and talents or other means of expression that you use in your life such as accounting, centering, counselling, designing, leading, managing, nursing, parenting, sharing, sport, training, selling, artistry, cooking, composing, dancing, encouraging, healing, learning, performing, sculpting, singing, supporting, writing, creating, co-ordinating, communicating, inspiring, listening, mediating, painting, planning, serving, studying, teaching, home-making, gardening... the list goes on an on and I would advise taking some time out to really think about these. I feel that we tend to overlook our own talents and abilities and it sometimes takes some digging to find out what they are.

Finally, think back to your childhood memories. Who was your hero and why? Think about what it was you wanted to do when you grew up and identify what it was about that vision of your childhood that attracted you to that particular job e.g. nurse - was it caring for people etc. Think about the qualities needed for those jobs you wanted to do and write them down and see if what you were interested then is still the same. Perhaps the job itself no longer appeals to you but the qualities needed for the job may still be important to you and could be incorporated into your career now.

Then look at all the information you have gathered. I doubt that a particular career is going to jump out at you but perhaps you might get some insight as to an area of work you feel is best suited to your talents and abilities and your learning style that is going to continue to stimulate your interest. I personally changed employers twice though what I was doing was the same type of work before I finally realised that it wasn't the job itself I was bored with but the type of work I was doing. It took me several years after that before I found what my true passion was going to be (I'm now 40 and like I said earlier, I now know I want to run inspirational workshops but I still lack the confidence to do it).

I also have a meditation I would (will) use in my workshops to help people to tune into their soul purpose/passion and I can type it out and put it on here if you would be interested in using it.

I hope that some of this has helped. Good Luck with finding your passion!

Brightest blessings
Carol

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2004
Sun, 02-13-2005 - 1:27pm

Hi Carol...


Great post! Could you please post the meditation? I am revisiting some of my books, yet again. I am really trying to work through this. This has been very difficult and scary. Hmmm...what do I want to be when I grow up? Childhood memories.....I am trying to see it through the eyes of that child. I miss her...lol.


Blessings.


~Kristin

 

"In short, all good things in life are wild and free."  ~Thoreau

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2004
Sun, 02-13-2005 - 5:37pm
I know how you feel. I am 30 and up until 2 years ago, I tried being "supermom". I was married at 21, had my first kid at 21, worked since I was 13, then went to school and worked fulltime at 16, then went to college and worked fulltime. My life was a whirlwind of craziness for a long time. I thought I had the perfect job although I NEVER had time for my kids. I always thought everything was perfect. Then, out of nowhere, I just freaked! I had a nervous breakdown. The money, the cars, the house...all meant nothing. After a year of being completely depressed, My husband and I started from scratch. I had NOTHING. I change my spirituality, focused on my inner self for once and took time with my kids. We've worked ourselves up the latter since then, but, looking back, they are some of the best times of my life! Sometimes I think we focus on looking for our passion through work, when it might be something that isn't involved with your work life. I feel now, if I go back in the work force, I'll have my priorities straight and I won't let my job take over my life. Although I know that this may not be an option for most, sometimes if you find something you enjoy on the sly, not at work, it can become a passion and eventually turn into something that can become a career.
Meditation also helps too. Educating yourself on interesting things..even if it is just at a library is great also. Getting involved at activities at a church and spiritual group works well too. I know a lady who LOVED history and geneology. She now does research for others as a homebased business. It sounds very interesting and she always seems busy and happy. What she likes the most is finding out the stories of peoples' past and she says there is never a dull moment. She also said it started with a group that her local library started and many of the people wanted to find their ancestries, but were too busy for the research.
I guess that's what life is all about. Searching. Whether you are looking for a spiritual, career,or relationship path, there is always frustration. I have been dealing with it in a spiritual way. Hang around here. People really have great ideas and experiences that can open your eyes!
R
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2001
Sun, 02-13-2005 - 8:39pm
What about becoming a writer??? Write childrens' books??? That would let you be creative and you like books and you would be writing them. You wouldn't have to worry about being bored at a desk job. You can do it at your own pace and work part time jobs here and there or get a full time job to tide you over until the book(s) get published.


CL for 11 years

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