Be careful what you wish for!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2004
Be careful what you wish for!!!
9
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 4:38pm

Some of you may remember that I posted a few weeks ago that I was feeling broody and thought perhaps it was a mid-life crisis after hitting 40 last year. Well I'm not going to have another baby but I have just found out I'm going to become a granny next year!!!

I do feel a little guilty and have some concern that my wanting a baby has played a part in creating this situation, as I do believe that the vibes we give out spread and help to create the situations around us. My daughter is only 19, has only been in her present job a couple of months and split up from the father just two weeks ago so had definitely not planned to have a baby at this point. She is pleased though now that she is getting over the shock and the father seems to be prepared to take responsibility and help out financially etc.

I can't help but feel excited at the prospect of having a baby around again but I am also concerned that I will find it difficult to step back and not act like the mother instead of the grandmother. Already I find myself planning things and then I have to remind myself that this is not my baby. I think we are all still a bit shocked and confused by this news as we only found out last Friday but hopefully with 8 months left to go we can straighten out any kinks before then.

Blessings Carol

Avatar for dustbunny48
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 6:09pm

Goodness...

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2004
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 6:57pm

Congrats on your grandchild!

It sounds tough now, but everything seems to have a way of working themselves out. My sister got pregnant unmarried and not intending to,at an early age and, because she was in the Navy, it seemed my parents and I raised him through most his early childhood, up until he was 7 and she retired on medical leave. It was tough sometimes for her and definitely for us! I was taking care of him in my last year of high school!
Funny thing is, we weren't that close as kids, but that child brought us close as adults. It is a tough thing to do, being a single mom, so if anything, try to be there for her as much as you can without doing too much where she may take advantage of your kindness. This will help her grow as a human being and as a mother. It will also strengthen your relationship as mother and daughter. My belief is, it may not have been the way way you or her would like to see a baby come into the world, but it definitely came for a reason. When it comes to a child, always focus on the positives and forget the negatives!

Good luck to you all!
R-

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
Wed, 06-01-2005 - 12:45am
Ah, then, you were not much older than your daughter when you had her...it's natural to want a baby at mid-life...but this is great news...Congratulations...I myself can't wait to be a grandmother someday as I never had one...and they are very special people :) too...I do hope I will be around to see those little ones...I had my first child at 37 and the second at 39...and I still hear the patter of little feet, only they're just a little bit bigger now, LOL.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-2003
Wed, 06-01-2005 - 9:27am
Carol, that's wonderful!

 

 

152.6&n

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2004
Wed, 06-01-2005 - 10:14am
Don't worry!!!!

Shyla

  

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-31-2003
Wed, 06-01-2005 - 11:47am
Wow!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2004
Wed, 06-01-2005 - 3:35pm

Thanks for ALL for your warm thoughts and good wishes. A couple of years ago I would to some extent have resented being put in this position so feel pleased that it has happened now when I feel ready for it and can enjoy it rather than feeling that it is a burden. For that and many other reasons that are falling place, such as my having just finished my studying enabling us to turn the study into a nursery, I feel like this is another one of those synchronistic times in life when things happen just as they are meant to :)

Blessings Carol

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-20-2000
Wed, 06-01-2005 - 7:57pm

Sorry, a bit late with my congratulations and well wishes...

what an exciting, frightening, life changing thing you're going to be experiencing together - or already ARE experiencing together! I look forward to hearing how you and your daughter both grow - together and as individuals - over the next several months, and after.

A happy and healthy 9 months I wish for your daughter, and hope you find your new role as mother to a truly adult daughter and grandmother of a small miracle to be fulfilling and exhilarating.

Congratulations!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2003
Wed, 06-01-2005 - 8:10pm

Carol,


This news sounds like a timely blessing.