Integrity .. *m

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Integrity .. *m
20
Fri, 06-10-2005 - 10:51am

I have a question for everyone.  (Lurkers, feel free to jump in!)  Is integrity lost in today's society?  Why?  Why not?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-10-2005 - 11:54am
Yes, I think that on the whole, we have lost a lot of integrity. As more and more of our dealings are done indirectly (as opposed to face-to-face with a handshake) it's become all to easy to 'fudge' the rules. I think most people are probably well-meaning, but... like I said, it's just too easy. Something else just popped into my head as I was typing... 'modern technology' has allowed us to relegate so many of our daily duties to machines (thinking dishwashers, washing machines, breadmakers, etc) that we've gotten a bit spoiled and lazy. That's carried over into less physical aspects of our lives as well. Such as the spiritual side. We're less disciplined.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2004
Fri, 06-10-2005 - 1:27pm
I agree with everything you said, ginger.cookie, plus I have to add that, in our society, everybody thinks everything needs to be done right away. I worked in a pharmacy, and I couldn't believe how many people would get ticked off if there prescriptions weren't done in 5 minutes. My favorite line when people complained is, " We aren't a fast food chain, and if you want us to be positive your getting the right medication, it needs to be checked and double checked before it is given to you." Add the drive-thru windows, which were meant for just dropping off prescriptions and picking up later, and it was just BAD. We had people who would hold up the line because they wouldn't move their cars until we finished their orders! "Convenience" has gotten way out of control and I believe, in America especially, we have forgotten what it is like to have to really work hard for something we really want. It usually is just given to us. Then, you see the people in this country who work their tails to the bone, and not have anything to show for it. What do most of us do? Ridicule them for having an ugly car or worn out clothes. I really do think we need to get our priorities straight.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
Fri, 06-10-2005 - 4:15pm

Well, gee whiz, ladycee, you don't mince words!

We had an "integrity" episode last night in our house...my eldest child came home crying from choir practice..seems she and another classmate were working toward the same goal and the other kid (who has been very flaky about attendance) won the honor of leading a song during Sunday's service...seems the teacher made a decision out of convenience and took my kid's steadfast participation for granted...rather than reward her for her patience and hard work. Does this sound like the work world or what???

I want to believe that working hard, being humble, and having perserverance get you somewhere, certianly they build integrity, right???...and I tell my children this is the way to go...but, there are times when I wonder...especially when teachers or people in positions of authority just roll over and cave to pressure, whether it be political, economic or just plain gutlessness.

I called the teacher last night...and I told her that I would very much appreciate her explaining to my daughter why she made her decision and how she could justify this other student's work record against my own child's participation??? The teacher said why didn't my child ASK for what she wanted??? I told her, she was raised to have manners, to wait her turn, to earn her rewards, that's why!

Like the previous post said, it's just too easy to take shortcuts these days and still win the prize...in fact, from what I've seen, if you play the political/social game, you can cheat the system all you like and still get what you want...but it's my dd's words from last night that are still ringing in my ears: "I don't want to leave the choir, I just want a fair choir." And that's when I feel I have to at the very least, try to make the world a better place. Baby steps.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-27-2004
Sat, 06-11-2005 - 5:27am

OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH I so agree yankee. My son when he was younger was in a local football team (I guess your version of little league). He was a regular team member and played every week, but it really ticked me off that the 'stars' got to play week in, week out whilst some of the other kids who were eager and dedicated turned up to practice, turned up to the matches and hardly ever got to play. I always felt that it should have been done on a reciprocal basis with everyone getting a turn and I really felt for these kids who hardly got to play.

Carol

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2003
Sat, 06-11-2005 - 10:14am

I initially started this thread with "I define integrity in my own life as..."


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Sat, 06-11-2005 - 2:33pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Sat, 06-11-2005 - 2:47pm

When TJ, my then 17 year old, was playing high school football, he was promised a lot of playing time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Sat, 06-11-2005 - 2:51pm

Well, gee whiz, ladycee, you don't mince words!


You wouldn't believe that I'm pretty shy, would ya?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
Sun, 06-12-2005 - 12:01am

LOL, yes, I would believe that...I find Internet communication to be quite interesting, kind of like acting...I used to work in theater (behind the scenes!) and I'd see very shy actresses just come alive on stage...who knew???

Thanks for the support...and guess what?...sometimes, that squeaky wheel stuff plays itself out (not very often for me though)...my dd is singing her first solo at church tomorrow...I sat through the rehearsal tonight and I hope I don't cry at the service...because it was very sweet...and she is so excited...she's put a lot of effort into this...and I cannot take the credit...it's the luck of the draw...and a big blessing...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
Sun, 06-12-2005 - 12:14am

Carol...today at our softball awards, one of the younger moms was saying something to this effect...that the girls who showed a good attitude and integrity should have been rewarded...sigh...I felt old and jaded because I've become so accustomed to unfairness in kids' sports...occasionally, my dd gets an honor or some bit of recognition...but more often than not, she doesn't.

Ironically, the team who cleaned up was one that we had played earlier in the season...and their coach was greedy...he took advantage of his situation and pressed for the win...apparently, ours wasn't the only team that he did this with...

In the end, I think that if you win by dishonorable means, you will have to pay the piper later...I'd rather pay my dues as I go along...I don't want to pay "back taxes," LOL.

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