Is It Too Late
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Is It Too Late
| Fri, 11-11-2005 - 2:04pm |
I have lived a life that at times has been a little risky (for myself and others around me) I have made poor decesions and I have done things Im not proud of. I would like to think that I have for the most part not hurt anyone. I have had my hateful moments, but I was never really mean. I feel guilty about some things, I know I cant make them go away but can I some how even out the big picture....you know 2 goods for every bad...does this help I wonder or do people like me just have to live thinking we are a few feet away from fire?..

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Hey, Stuck!
I feel like after a while of negative, a person "matures", learns, and returns to "be who she/he was meant to be.
Cee Cee
**you know how close you can *allow* yourself next to that fire! That a lot of the battle gone, don't cha think?**
You know I guess your right...lol.
I have settled a lot this year. The storm (I live in Gulfport MS) Kinda made me think about how lucky I am, so I got out of that hate myself mood I sometimes slip into while pondering on the last few years and some of my crazy mistakes. Its odd Im on this board to be honest I know nothing about Spirituality and truly have little faith... I like learning about different stuff but I cant say I have faith in anything.. thought it would be nice to read about some things...
It may be my time to find me too...
Stuck on Earth
Stuck on earth
Congratulations on crossing the threshhold into questioning and pondering 'who am I?!!"
Bink
For me its not thinking too much about which direction I'm going but more often where Ive been.. See I have well lets say a past thats more than odd. I am new to this board, and havent been on any boards in 6 months, but if you were to see old post from me you'd may understand my confusion and the good-bad pull I often feel. Im 27 im in the middle of a divorce (needed) I was in an open marriage for the most part of the last 2 years. At times when my marriage was Not opened is when I strayed the most for some reason. I have guilt trips over things and (people) Ive done... Now I just moved in with my boyfriend that I started seeing before I left my husband. I still dont consider myself a bad person really (it was odd circumstands at the time) But it brings up questions for me about myself. I am not a person that would hurt, or be mean to anyone really but I often question my own intentions (not knowing what to expect from me)I have very manic moods caring little of consequences. I have had really strong moods lately, but my boyfriend honestly has unknowingly gotten me thru them. See I have sexual type moods in the passed other people would get me out of the mood, He is very opened and our sexual conection keeps me from straying from him. The problem I sometimes have with us is questioning my true feelings for him. Is it ok that it is mostly sexual things that make me love him, or remain faithful to him? I come to this board knowing that my struggles with God and or religion is what sets off my guilt trips and sometimes my manic moods.
Stuck
Stuck on earth
Irakrause
I have the moods a few times a month or so, Its not a head ache at all I actually feel great during a mood swing of mine. I need less sleep, I wake up better, and I am very hyper. Its controlable I think, I'm just hard headed and more spiteful when I'm that way. You could say I have wild, dont care about nothing moods. I am not even close to depression at those times, its the after that has always caught up to me.
Stuck
Stuck on earth
life is in the present moment. The past is done. Where where we are
today is because of what our experiences are. It is to grow thru the experiences.
When i get to feel guilty, I have to talk to myself and knock it off.
No one is perfect and everyone has skeletons in the closet. Just
think how wonderful it is to have the awareness. If you need to appologize to
anyone, then do it ansd forget it. new day to live. Love, Leila
Congratulations on crossing the threshhold into questioning and pondering 'who am I?!!"
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