Should we try to be happy?
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| Fri, 12-30-2005 - 5:05pm |
I was reading a post on another board that got me thinking of this question. About how some people just seem to live a miserable life because they choose a certain perspective that takes out all the joy. In my spiritual path over the years, I have studied various religions, practiced a few, was raised in one, and I found some to be very different than the others, regarding this thing called "happiness" here in this life.
What do you think? Is there a possibility of being happy in this life? Should you seek it out? Are you responsible for anyone else's happiness besides your own? How do you define happiness? Should the definition be the same for everybody? Does your definition have anything to do with your spiritual path or belief system?
Gypsy

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Good question!
I agree with your answer, Jodi. You're so right. Happiness is fleeting and reactionary. Joy is an outlook and is not affected by external influences. But it's not easy to achieve joy. If it were, then everyone would be experiencing it. To experience joy one has to be in the right frame of mind, one has to prepare mind and soul to get to that place.
-gnd-
<< Are you responsible for anyone else's happiness besides your own? >>
IMHO, we are only capable of being responsible for our own happiness. In doing so, we can be a positive influence on others. But we cannot be responsible for anyone else's happiness. We shouldn't even attempt it. Because that's like saying we don't respect another for taking charge of his/her own life.
-gnd-
Is there a possibility of being happy in this life? Should you seek it out?
Absolutely on both questions!
Yes I think one can find happiness in this life. I also agree that happiness is short term and that Joy is internal. I think you can find both in this life and that you can lose both as well. By choosing to following your joy you find it, but sometimes you can get lost from that path. It's a journey we all take and it takes us all to different places.
To answer some others of your questions, Yes I think we should seek it. I don't think happiness should be defined the same for everyone I also don't think it's definition is the same in every situation. And I can't say I always define happiness by my spiritual path or beliefs, but at times I do. Happiness is something that is not easily explained. But I can easily explain the moments when I feel/find happiness.
As far as are we responsible for others happiness...I'm a mother to a 3 year old and I do feel responsible for her happiness (at this time in her life anyway). That's a new thing for me to think because I have always been a big believer in everyone is responsible for their own happiness. Now that I think of it I can be influenced by the moods of those around me...Hum...maybe there is something to taking a more pro-active role to others happiness.
I wonder, Gypsy, what are your views?
Rae
OK. Here's my "take." :D
"Is there a possibility of being happy in this life?"
Absolutely. I do believe, however, that we each have to set the criteria for ourselves, as to what constitutes happiness for ourselves. And I think that ties into our spiritual perspective.
"Should you seek it out?"
Absolutely! I believe we are intended to enjoy happiness here on this physical plane. Part of our evolution through Reincarnation and Karma has to do with learning how to do this.
"Are you responsible for anyone else's happiness besides your own?"
No, I don't think so. Not even for children. If we try to provide this for others, I think we do them a disservice and create a dyfunctional dependency on us. Not a good idea, especially with something like happiness, which is created by a person's own hard work and perceptions and choices.
"How do you define happiness? Should the definition be the same for everybody? Does your definition have anything to do with your spiritual path or belief system?"
Happiness doesn't have to do with possessions or money, IMO. It has to do with being spiritually awake, living in balance with Nature and one's own existence. A spiritual path helps, but is not specifically necessary, I don't think. Although, for me, it is. I think each person has to determine what happiness is for them, and that can change throughout his/her life, from being a young child, to far wider ramifications in adulthood. I think one's personal definition has to be free-flowing and flexible because it's a learning process. We try out different definitions and see how they "fit." It has to do with personal evolution as Spirit, and the lessons and wisdom that one learns throughout life. It is in the definitions we create and try to emulate that we learn what real happiness is, I think.
I believe the Goddess means us to be happy, joyful, living in harmony. We just aren't evolved enough to make it happen. That's why we are "works in progress." :))
Joy and happiness, IMO, are part of each other. Neither can exist without the other. Happiness is the balance and harmony one reaches. Joy is how we express our happiness, by how we live, feel, be.
Gypsy
Blessings,
Gypsy
)O(
I found it quite funny to read your post.
This past weekend I had a convo with DH regarding happiness. How its just harder for some people to obtain and accept thier happiness.
I am pretty easy going, it takes quite a bit to ruffle my feathers (LOL), so it takes little or no effort to find happiness or joy, but then I have come to terms with my past hurdles in life and feel that I am where I need to be and I'm at peace with that.
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Yes! Happiness is everywhere. Even in the smallest of things, its just how people accept and percieve things.
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IMO...happiness seeks us out. Again...its all in how one accepts and percieves things.
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This one is a wee bit harder (LOL). I believe that people are brought into our lives for a reason. Sometimes we can provide a short supply of happiness or joy for someone, but it really isn't up to us. It falls into that "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink." thingy. (LOL)
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Accepting, Content, Fulfilled, at Peace.
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Should it be? Yes, but sadly it isn't. Again...its all in acceptance and perception.
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Since my spiritual path has evolved throughout my life, I'm sure it does in a way contribute to my happiness.
V :)
I agree with your definition of happiness and thought you expressed yourself wonderfully.
I should clarify a little about the respectability for our children's happiness. I think a large part of parenting is in giving all the necessary tools to your child so they can be a responsible and independent adult. You spoke of harmony with nature, a spiritual awakening or path as ways to find happiness, I agree but view these as tools. I feel it's a responsibility to teach my child what different variables happiness has and how to find them. I am aware that I cannot force my path of happiness or even joy itself on anyone, even my child. That's just the point of view I had when I said yes I thought we are responsible for our children's happiness.
Rae
I agree as parents, giving our children a foundation from which they can grow is helpful. I think sharing our spiritual journey is a good thing, as well, even if our journey takes turns and detours and we change spiritual practices or religions along the way. I also think it's good to educate our children as they get older about different world religions and spiritual practices and philosophies. Eventually they will have to make their own choices, so if they know there are some tools out there to help them, I consider it a good thing, too. :) I just refrained from presenting my spiritual focus as THE one to my DD when she was growing up, that it was the BEST one out there. It was just ONE of many, from which she could choose.
Gypsy
Blessings,
Gypsy
)O(
I think that we can be happy in this life and whilst I don't think we are responsible for another person's happiness I don't think it does any harm to help others towards finding happiness if we are capable and willing of doing something that will bring them some happiness.
My own personal experience is that I had never experienced happiness until the last few years although I was unaware of this until I experienced sadness. I'd wandered through life without experiencing any feelings of any depth until an event caused me great heartache and whilst I prefer the happy feelings to the sad ones I also prefer a world where emotions are experienced to the one I knew before.
It's hard for me to define happiness other than as bursts of great joy and I don't believe that my definition should be everyone's definition. My definition is probably in part because of both my spiritual path and belief system but also my personal experiences and observations.
~Carol~
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