FAITH AND TRUST IN THNGS/VENT

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2006
FAITH AND TRUST IN THNGS/VENT
2
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 1:08am
I do not even know where to start their is so much from the past and present and this is a big issue for me to deal with is having faith,trust in things and the people that you see in your Church. Was abuse as a child by my stepgrandfather who was a priest guess that started things off amoung other things When you been thru some of the things that I have had to deal with and being told lie after lie about things instead of being told the truth and even to this day. I really think that some play me for a fool. Ever time their is a church activity
going on and I sing up to help and to get things when it comes time for me to be part of that getting and going with others something always happens I feel in order to be full part of the activity and doing things is to start it from day one to the end A church Picnic On Sunday me and another person in the family were suppose to go with the office manager to pick up somethings for this activity Sunday,Now some one in our family has a tooth problem
and I know how that is but the plands were made long ago for this other and it was said that another member in the family was going to watch the kids while we did this other now things have change I will not be taking part in tomorrow activity because I will be home with the boys makes me crazy because I feel that the original plan should not have change now ever one seems to be pleased with the change now that I am not going to be going. But yet I am going to be expected to do what I had sing up to help with and it is not in me anymore to do loss the interest in doing whatI had sing up to help and do I do not feel part of it anymore. On top of this many other things have happen and one preist that was their that ever one had trust in and thought I could have trust in got the boot for messing up big time. ONE OF the ministry leaders that heads of a corse tells me that you can only take it once when I know full well that people have taken it more then once. so much going on so much to say and trying to put things in to words is not easy. people around you you just do not expect them to twist things around lie one minute and the truth come out when they are talking to another person and the person that has Fib says that she never said that when you say well you did not say that or this which is the truth. Their are a few people that have follow in the once person foot steps it is their way of control
of what I do or do not do then for the final things or clean up then that is when I am needed I am tried of it If I cannot be part of it from start to finish then I do not need to be doing it at all. Am I worng for me to fell the way that I do. With in time more will come out I just got to put it in the right words. It is a feeling of being left out and only included when their is very little or nothing to do but the clean up. feel that if this is the way that they want it they can have it and I will just stand back and watch.
Kim
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 11:15am

Hi Kim and welcome to Faith & Spirituality!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2006
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 11:43am

Thanks for the support and the links I do need to find my faith and sperit which I do not have anymore and just when I think that I do it is rip from under me and others cannot understand way I do not have the trust and faith ,sprit in me. How can one have trust in faith in some one that is always fibbing to you cannot be honest with you but yet I am the one with the problem. Their is just so much that I need to iron out and work thru.

Thanks again for your support.

Kim