QOTW - Are you a joiner?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2003
QOTW - Are you a joiner?
6
Mon, 03-05-2007 - 6:40pm

How do you feel about joining groups, actually signing a paper and being a "member" of something?  This doesn't just apply to religious groups, but groups in general. 


(Gypsy just joined her local UU congregation and hopefully will tell us all about it!)


Bink


Not really into Siggees...
 
Not all who wander are lost.
(J.R.R. Tolkien)


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-05-2007 - 9:00pm

I'm not much of a joiner... I tend to be a bit committment phobic.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2001
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 1:04pm

And here I am... LOL! :D

It was just a few simple moments in front of the altar table after Sunday's service, as I signed the membership book (which is always open and displayed during services). I had a little group of people I have become close to, standing around, giving me hugs, after I officially signed. It was hard to see, as I had tears welling up in my eyes. :P Even now, remembering, I get goose bumps and tears...

And, normally, no, I am not a joiner. Have never liked "groups." I always preferred solitude and alone time to social groups. Some of it is recent because of my hearing difficulties when in larger groups of people, all talking at once. Some of it is my natural inclination. Even as a child, I loved sitting quietly and alone under a tree, or in a "nest" inside a hedge, listening to nature, feeling the warmth of the sun, etc. I always felt "different" because I stand back, observe, think about things. I felt sometimes, inadequate or somehow "less" because I was different. Just walking to a different drum beat.

If there's anywhere I can still be my true self without feeling in jeopardy by sharing my inner thoughts, it's at the UU church. Because it's very principles and what they call a "covenant" with each other, supports and respects each person's journey and wisdom and "personal theology" he/she has developed with long effort. My signing the membership book also means I commit to this covenantal connection to each person there, that I will give them the spiritual acceptance, respect and space that I want for myself, and work to keep our community open and welcoming in how I respond to others.

My Goddess nudged me out of my solitary hermit life last April. Where She will guide me next is a mystery. I am happy just to have found a spiritual space where I can be who I really am, and not what others want me to be. Where I can speak my truth without fear of rejection or condemnation or judgment.

Gypsy
)O(



Blessings,

Gypsy

)O(



iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2003
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 1:23pm

I know I am being nudged from several directions to find a spiritual home, but so far, I haven't.


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2003
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 1:31pm

I'm so happy for you!


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2001
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 1:53pm

I think you should go with your "gut." If there is another UU church in your area, you might also try them out, to see if you get the same feeling you did with the other one.

You know, I checked out (on-line only) my church a well as the national web site for UU, a couple of years ago. I just didn't get that "nudge" inside to go in person to check things out. So I remained a Solitary Wiccan and went back into hibernation. :P I still felt I needed something *more* in my spiritual life, but the idea of actually attending a strange church with strange people didn't fill me with eagerness. So I did nothing.

Then, last April, on another board, and then this one, many people began posting again about the UU church. ;) And most importantly for me, other Pagans who were members. THIS TIME I felt a nudge from my Goddess. And I did something that even surprised me... I just showed up one Sunday at that UU Church. And another nudge, when they ask who was new, I actually stood up and announced myself. Where did that courage come from? Not from me, LOL! :D I just felt that nudge from the Goddess, and went with it. Many people came up to greet me, including the minister, who gave me a hug that first Sunday. I'm not one to hug strangers, but in that hug I felt my Goddess. I can't explain it. It was just "right." And then I just kept going. Found myself going to the twice monthly Wed. morning meditation group and joining the Social Justice committee. I decided if I really wanted to know what this church was about, what the people were really like, and if it was going to be a good fit for me, I'd have to "jump in" and test the waters. So I volunteered at an event, talked to the minister, talked to others. Did some reading. Found out about the Pagan Circle group, joined that (which my DD also joined). Now I had the best of both worlds -- my solitary path plus not one, but TWO communities of Spirit! :)

So, the timing may be off. The "vibes" may have been off at that church for you that first time. And may be different now. Still, I'd go with your "gut." I imagine each church is a little different, in terms of feeling welcoming, as that depends on feeling connection to the people and the minister, as well as the philosophy of it. KWIM? I don't think I'd have gone back if my first actual experience had been less than welcoming or I just felt "ho-hum." UU may not be the avenue that fits you, either.

Trust yourself. Take your time. Trust your instincts.

Hugs,
Gypsy
)O(



Blessings,

Gypsy

)O(



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 4:29pm

Even as a child, I loved sitting quietly and alone under a tree, or in a "nest" inside a hedge, listening to nature, feeling the warmth of the sun, etc. I always felt "different" because I stand back, observe, think about things. I felt sometimes, inadequate or somehow "less" because I was different.


I can sooo relate!