I am back!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2006
I am back!
3
Tue, 09-05-2006 - 8:51am
Hello ya all! I am back from my holiday and thought I'd drop by and see how everyone is doing? I have been thinking a lot about you guys. Anyway, my holiday was good. I already mentioned reconnecting with my friend Nellie (highlight of the holiday) and the places we visited were simply amazing, the food delicious and the weather hot hot hot. On the other hand, we had a series of mishaps (we were even close to a major fire) and silly things going wrong, plus I am back to the place I so desperately don't want to be in so I am having mixed emotions today. I guess what gets me down a little is the realization that everything has changed and it will never ever be the same as it was two years ago. I have changed, people around me have changed... Nellie has not been part of my life for so long that now she is missing out on very important things that happened to me, things I could not bring myself to telling her. I am sure we will keep in touch and that we will rebuild the friendship slowly but something is missing. We don't live in the same country (none of the people I care about other than my parents live in this country - and that is a whole different story) and I am back to the same emptiness of an every day life I hate as before. The really frustrating thing is that I could have a social life here. It is me who is resisting it. The vast majority of the people I meet here are everything I don't want a friend to be. This place really does not agree with me. I was totally fine on holiday as I am fine every time I go somewhere else.... Fingers crossed I will be able to escape by new years...Oh well, a little bit of venting right there. Guess it is the holiday blues or something! Anyway, I will be writing soon, as soon as I figure out what is worth sharing that is!
Take care all of you, Lori, Blue! I am thinking about you guys!!!!!
Love
Rosaura
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2004
In reply to: rosaura2006
Tue, 09-05-2006 - 12:57pm

Hi Rosaura,


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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2006
In reply to: rosaura2006
Tue, 09-05-2006 - 1:56pm
Hi Lori!!!!!!!!So great to hear from you! I have been thinking about you! Hope you are doing well! So, I know you are right about the post holidays blues. I am sure it happens to almost everyone, perhaps it is a chemical imbalance or something regardless of issues that need to be addressed. I guess my situation only makes a normal reaction a bit bigger, that's all. I mean my holiday was good but far from perfect. There were problems, bikering (not by me... I try to only vent here lol) tensions etc. still, I reckon that even annoying things happening to me is better than nothing at all happening to me, which is pretty much how empty my life over here is. As for the new agey stuff, I actually think you are spot on! I can feel it in my bones that I am not meant to be here and this is not meant to be my life. I mean i have been here for three days and they have been really long days, my spirit is elsewhere. I only have to grow a bit stronger in order to make the move, work through some issues (stronger one: parents but it is another long story) But you are right. I might still be a little messed up in a different place but I sure can not stay where I am (I hardly speak the language for crying out loud!)
Anyway, I am looking forward to more great conversations with you and the rest of the ladies. It is so important just to have someone understand!
So, take care of yourself, I'll be fine eventually. It is the holiday blues syndrome...
Love and hugs!!!!!
Rosaura
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2005
In reply to: rosaura2006
Mon, 09-11-2006 - 4:29pm

Welcome back Rosaura!


I'm glad you enjoyed your vacation and sorry to hear that



"I am back to the same emptiness of an every day life I hate as before"


I totally understand the feeling. I too felt the same way on my vacation these last three weeks. I was almost Euphoric being in a different province and meeting a friend and then returing to my province (although not my city) and helping out at the Ottawa folk festival. As soon as I was on the bus home though I started stressing out over my home life, and when I got home it got worse and I landed in a deep pit of depression and also got very

Amanda