Agggh, Lori, I set myself up for ... m..
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Agggh, Lori, I set myself up for ... m..
| Mon, 10-02-2006 - 2:53pm |
something... disappointment, more than likely.
I sent B a letter recently, about a week and a half ago (?). So, I felt really good about this letter, I think I mentioned it to you. In fact, I know I mentioned it to you.
Anyway... I decided to follow up with an E-MAIL to him. This morning. UGH... NOT a good idea, because I am really wanting him to respond. I NEED him to respond. :( I'm going to cry buckets if he doesn't. The e-mail was nothing bad... it was all good. Kind of reiterating what was in my written letter... and, foolishly asking if he got it. (Yeah, dumb...)
So here I sit, at the computer, checking my e-mails all the time. I SO WANT TO HEAR FROM HIM.
*sigh*
V


Hi Vida,
Lori, I understand what you are saying... and yeah, I would say it's true when it comes to B.
In fact... the last day I saw him he said something to that effect... about him being like an addiction.
:(
I'm feeling really really badly because I didn't hear from him. Dang it. I figured he'd be "allowed" to respond... being that I was doing better. This is killing me inside... yet again.
Hey Vida...honey. Just sending you hugs. You can and will get through this. This is the borderline stuff coming through. B didn't abandon you, but he did only what he thought was best for you.
You are doing well, and I hope you will stop emailing and writing to him. It will keep you 'stuck' in this cycle, my friend. I soooo don't want to see the cycle continue for you.
Make the MOST of what you have RIGHT NOW THIS VERY MINUTE and practice MINDFULNESS. Its a borderline therapy. Google it and there is some great info about it. I do it, and it works great.
Keep talking and let me know how you are doing.
Love and Hugs,
Keli
Hi Vida,
Hi Keli, Hi Lori...
I'm doing okay... I should mention, I haven't written to him or emailed him in ages before this last "one-way correspondence", I assure you.
I know that this is the borderline stuff coming through. I hate it, but I know it. But I'm so hanging in there. :)
Keli, I know mindfulness... I did the DBT... :) It was one of my weak points, though. LOL.
In other news... I began taking the Yaz birth control pill on Sunday... I may have already mentioned that. It's to try to treat the PMDD symptoms. I feel that, if the PMDD can be under control some, then I will be okay. It's going to take a few cycles before we know if it's working... wish me luck!
Vida
Hi Vida,