how and Why trigs

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
how and Why trigs
2
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 11:00am

how do I get past this rough spot usually it isnt this bad for this long, my DD and I have been fighting like cats and dogs for about a month now she got angry with me and told me to screw off and that took me back a few steps.

Why do I continue to have flash backs and horrible dreams. I am soon going to be w/o a T and then I am going to really go down hill my T helps keep me on the right path and I am falling and there just isnt anything to grasp onto anymore. I am trying to hold out until after Christmas but that is really hard and my youngest son's B-day in on Thanksgiving and that even looks so far in the future as of now.

All I think of is ways to do it and ways to harm myself I love stepping on the leves in the fall and hearing them crunch beneath my feet but yesterday it made me cry kowing that soon I will not hear that sound again. Everyone will be much better off w/o me and I know everyone says that my kids will be so hurt but look what I am doing to them now, I cant do this anymore and I dont want to either.. Dont know how or when but I have to do it and this time the police wont find me at all.

Mary

Mary
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 12:11pm

Mary...oh honey...

Would you consider going into the hospital and staying for a while?????

You desperately need to be inpatient right now. I know it sucks! I know it...I hate doing it too...but when it gets THIS BAD, there is no other option.

The option you're thinking of, is the easy way out of this horrible PAINFUL situation...it will get you out of it, yeah...but look - REALLY LOOK at how many lives you will be destroying!!!

If you allow yourself, you can get better...you won't be cured...but your quality of life CAN improve so much. Its a hard journey...and it takes a lot of work...and you can't give up...but its worth it.

I still struggle...but never as much as I used to.

Please go to the ER and check yourself in. Please.

Love always,

Keli

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2004
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 3:20pm

Hi Mary,


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