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| Sat, 10-28-2006 - 2:10pm |
well as you know from Marsha's post I am still with you guys, I am upset tho, for a few reasons 1 of them being that Marsha said that some part of me has a desire to live bc I called her well the only reason I called her was that I wanted her to hear from me that I was ending it, and the other reason is I was found. I am tired of fighting, and yes I know how to talk to the docs and I know how to manipulate them I have done this for so long, that I have lost faith in the system, I will NOT go back to the hospital as inpatient. I know a lot of ppl are sick of me and to tell you the truth I am sick of myself, I was treated like total garbage yesterday and the next time I will not call Marsha, I am very very angry and hurt at the same time. So see inpatient isnt going to do any good for me you cant help me there is not help out there for me.
Mary

Hi Mary,
"Marsha said that some part of me has a desire to live bc I called her well the only reason I called her was that I wanted her to hear from me that I was ending it,"
I said that, not Marsha. And I still believe it- and meant it as a good thing! All your friends want you to live- becuase they care about you, Mary.