Eleven days alone

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2005
Eleven days alone
12
Tue, 01-16-2007 - 4:25pm

DH left at 4 am this morning for his annual training for the army reserves. In another state.

My heart aches, I actually feel a physical pain in my chest. We can't even talk on the phone becuase we'll be working opposite shifts and there's a time difference. So when I come home from work, he'll be just going to work. When he comes home from work, it will be the middle of the night for me. He is working 12 hour shifts every day, he's going to be so tired!

It would not be so bad if I had family or friends here. But I don't. I'm trying to make plans to see my parents this Saturday.

I'm trying to get up the courage to invite an ex-coworker over for dinner. The stressful thing about that is she has a family- 2 kids and a DH that I've never met. I'm not good at cooking for large groups and that will be 5 people. And I'm also really nervous about being in groups and I'm stressed about about being a hostess for 4 people by myself. I'm quiet around strangers. What if her DH doesn't like me? What if the kids are bored? I wish I could just invite my friend over but I know that would be really rude.

I also made a spa apointment for next week, for a facial and massage. But other than that, I'm going to have way too much time and be alone for way too long. I only work 25 hours a week. Right now I wish I worked more hours!

That's another thing, I'm worried about being layed off at work becuase we've been having a really slow period for a month and they're concerned. I'd be the first one laid off becuase I'm the least important one there. (That's not low self esteem, it's reality).

I'm hungry but forcing myself to wait until 5:30 to eat dinner becuase that's my big event of the night and I don't want to do it too soon.

Last night I made pizza for my husband's last dinner home. I make the dough and everything from scratch and it tastes really good. I was so happy to make it for him, and happy becusae he ate 5 pieces which is a lot for him. But it's so depressing to cook for one! I'm just making a frozen dinner becuase I don't like leftovers.

I tried to look for a local gym or better yet, yoga or dance class I could join but I can't find any good ones close by! It's hard for me becuase I hate driving so I want to find close places.

I can think of lots of things I'd like to do- but they are all either expensive, far away, or both. I'm doing the spa anyway but I can't go crazy spending money becuase we're not rich.




Edited 1/16/2007 5:09 pm ET by bluerains

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2005
Fri, 01-19-2007 - 3:05pm

I bet spending time with your friends and parents will be helpful. Your parents wouldn't drive out to see you if they couldn't so try to erase that guilt from your mind. I know, easier said than done. I have guilt issues too.


Good luck on your valentines card. That should be fun and very special.

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Amanda

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2005
Fri, 01-19-2007 - 4:29pm
Aww, how sweet Robin, thank you! That would be great. Thanks for thinking of me and letting me know you care! It helps.

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