don't know what to do

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
don't know what to do
11
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 4:14pm

Well i'm trying to stay focused on other things right now, but
this week on monday i went for a needle biopsy, last week they found a lump in my right breast. when they did that it was fluid that came out so that is a good sign she said. I also have a boil on my stomach and she tried to drain that but couldn't so she changed my antibiotic and i go in on thursday to have that cut out which will take 2 to 3 stitches. I got a call today from the Health Dept. it seems when i was in the hospital back before christmas I tested positive to T.B.!!! so i have to go again on friday to have more tests done and if it does come back positive this time I will have to stop my Remicaide treatments and they don't know what i will do then!!!

So today is my dh's and my 20th wedding anniversary. he has a upper chest infection i'm depressed and he isn't giving me the support that i need. I just needed him to tell me everything was going to be ok. with all three major things going on with my body right now i just need a hug or a kind word to tell me i'm going to be ok not to listen to him tell me i'm over reacting. let them stick a need in his boob and see how he likes it. let them stick a need into the center of sore on his stomach and see how it feels let them cut him open to take it out, let them call him and tell him h e may have some deadly disease. just a few short months ago I was actually thinking about driving my car off a bridge or into a tree now i just want to fight for my life and i feel it is slipping away from me.

Robin

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2005
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 4:37pm

Happy 20th anniversary Robin! That is very impressive that you have been married for 20 years.

I'm sorry you feel so sick though and have all these health problems. It does seem to all happen at once. I hope in the same way, it all gets better at once.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2004
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 4:59pm

Hi Robin,


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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 10:49pm

The strange thing is right now i'm tired which is a given with the remicaide. but i don't feel sick. i'm breathing fine with the exception of the asthma every now and then. i just don't understand why everything has to happen at once.

Then dh and i go out to dinner (just a small resteraunt) and bring home stuff to make banana splits for the kids to kind of celebrate and i find out my SIL who is addicted to rx drugs comes and searches my house and asks the kids where my ambien is. she didn't find it. but now she is calling and offering to spend her day off with me tomorrow because she is bored. when she really wants to drive me to the hospital becuse she knows i'm getting the boil cut out and is hoping i'll get pain meds and give them to her. um NOT! i told her no i'll be fine to drive myself. she said she just wants to be here for me. yea right!!!!

my dh needs to have a talk with her but he keeps putting it off. it's not the first time shse has showed up here looking for meds and she has taken them out of the hosue before. the kids didn't know what to do. luckily i came home today from staying at a friends house for a few days so my meds were all still locked in my car and she couldn't find them or get to them.!

Robin

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 10:57pm

Thanks Lori, You guys always help me to feel better when i'm down.

After i had the scare in the hospital i realised how precious life is. I still have the every day emotional pain and i'm dealing with it and trying to get through it. I know a few short months ago that if these things happened i wouldn't be able to handle them. but i found you guys and listened to you and am now meeting with a therapist. my dh and i go tomorrow at 12 so i'll get to talk to someone. also after the close call i had befor Christmas it helped me to realise how precious it is and thats when i learned about Karen. I guess focusing on someone else right now helps me to get through my own baggage. i've grown to care about that little girl and now everyone asks me how is karen or how is Lori I always tell people how i came to know Karen and The Nash family. Helping Karen and making her happy is giving me something to focus on and bring some good out of my own misery. I hope one day to meet Fern (karens grandmother) she is a wonderful uplifting person and always so positive. I think god led me to Fern for a reason because she has really helped me to see that life throws you curves and you just have to bend with them.

Hope you all are feeling and doing ok tonight.

Robin

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2005
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 1:06am
OMG I'm so sorry to hear that things are going badly for you. All my hugs and love.

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Amanda

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2004
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 10:23am

Hey Robin,


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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 11:04am

When I first called. Fern answered the phone and i just told her you don't know me but and then i told her and how i heard about them and the conversation just took off from there. That was new years eve night and we were on the phone for over an hour! Each time i've talked to her we are on the phone for atleast a half hour or more. She is the sweetest lady i've ever met and she loves that little girl you can hear it in her voice. i've talked to Fred also and he is an amazing man.

Go ahead and give them a call i'm sure they would love to hear from you.

robin

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2005
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 5:41pm

"Then dh and i go out to dinner (just a small resteraunt) and bring home stuff to make banana splits for the kids to kind of celebrate"

That sounds very romantic! I love banana splits and it's a rare treat, something I don't get that often, so that sounds really fun.

I'm sorry about your SIL. It's kind of selfish becuase you really need those pills and she's trying to take them! But that's addiction. I hope she didn't ruin your anniversary!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 10:01pm

no she didn't but my dd and my dh are trying to ruin my night now.

my dd last night took the towels out of the dryer still damp and threw them on the floor to put her stuff in. then she took my stuff out of the dryer still damp and threw them in a basket she wants the code to the t.v and i told her no not until she fixes the mistake she made with the clothes. dh is upstairs yelling down at me to give her the da__ code! and i won't do it! so looks like tonight should be a fun intresting night.

Robin

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2004
Fri, 02-02-2007 - 11:06am

Hey Robin,


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