Sick of just about everything
Find a Conversation
Sick of just about everything
| Thu, 02-22-2007 - 7:03pm |
I just need to let some stuff out. I know I have become depressed over the winter. I usually do get really down when it is cold and snowy but this year I feel I just have been hit harder with it. I have tried taking meds in the past, but they just aren't me. Plus, they make my stomach upset. I try to exercise to relieve my depression. But lately I feel like nothing is going right. I work full-time, but it is a stressful job. I am also an evening student, so much of my free time is spent doing my homework. And I have been coming down with a cold or something every other week. It seems like I am constantly sick. Doesn't sound like much is really wrong, right? Well, I am just not really happy with anything. The only thing that truly makes me happy is my pets. I don't think I would ever have the nerve to really end my own life, but I have just thought about it and I would miss my pets terribly but I don't really think I can say that for anyone else. My boyfriend is verbally abusive most of the time. I am 40 and he is a couple years younger than me, but he has all this energy and he complains about me constantly. I have tried telling him to move on if he isn't happy with me. but he won't move on. Probably 'cause there isn't a soul out there that would listen to his b.s. for long. I feel so trapped. I grew up in a family that was relatively poor and uneducated. I have been trying for years to better myself and have had nothing but stumbling blocks along the way. It's all so hard though. My mother was always depressed and still is. There is a mild depression that I have inherited, and at certain times it seems to intensify. It just seems like everyone else has great things going on and are surrounded by people that love them and I just feel very alone. My pets are the only things I truly cherish and that make me feel happy. I just never thought at this age I would feel like this. It upsets me to know that I am this far into my life and i can't find a better life. I really hate complaining like this because of course things could be much worse. I am not an ungrateful person. It just seems like my life has so many good things missing from it. At my age, my friends all have their families and their own thing going on. I live alone, which I prefer, but I guess I just feel really lonely and misunderstood.

I'm kind of on the same page you are, some things different, but I know how you feel. Life just seems to be draining me right now. It seems that no matter how hard I try to make my life better, there are so many potholes along the way.
You don't live with your boyfriend, do you? You mentioned that you live alone, so I assume that means not with him. Have you ever told him what's going on with you? I'm not excusing his behavior, especially since I don't know very much. But maybe he'd be kinder if he understood. If he doesn't, is he worth it?
Hello and welcome. You don't have to feel lonely anymore, you can join us. :)
What kind of pets do you have? I love animals. My landlord doesn't allow them but I dream of getting a pet one day. You're very important to those special animals who need you. Giving animals a good home and love is very, very important!
Maybe you will move on from your boyfriend and let him complain to himself! You could probably meet someone new at school one of these days. You never know what will happen next week, next month, etc.
Hi and welcome to the board... I'm glad you found us--though I'm sorry you aren't feeling so well these days.
anyhow, because I have been so bogged down with school, my friendships have suffered as well. I just keep telling myself that in a couple more months, this will be over and I will be able to do whatever i want with my free time. but yet I am so scared. I want my life to be my own and it seems like my boyfriend keeps trying to control my decisions. And I have become more and more isolated from my friends and family. That is why I am happiest when I am at home, by myself, with my pets. I have been sleeping every chance I get because I don't even want to be awake really. I would rather be sleeping and avoid everything.
Hey there,