Need help for my mother
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| Mon, 04-30-2007 - 8:00am |
Newbie here. I got a phone call from my dad late last night. It seems my mother has been telling my cousin that she thinks its time to jump off a bridge in VT. My cousin called my parents best friend's concerned about her well being. Dad's friend called him, dad called me. Have I confused you yet?
Mom has been miserable lately (not that she's ever been a happy person) and has a history of depression and prescription drug addiction. She made a suicide attempt about 20 years ago, an overdose. I know she's been seeing a psychiatrist all these years but she would never admit it to her kids. God forbid she would ever discuss a problem with us instead of a doctor, not that the doctor is a bad thing. I just think she simply goes to him for her monthly supply of drugs, not to help her problems.
My advice to dad last night was that he needed to find mom's meds and get the doctor's name she's been seeing. If he can't find that then he needs to call her primary care doctor. I know with the HIPPA policies the doctor's can't say a lot to us, but we can say a lot to them.
This is certainly a very long story in a nutshell. I just don't know which direction to go in. I'm scared, confused and angry that she didn't take the help that was offered to her 20 years ago. I don't think she's going to pull anything stupid today but it's coming soon.
Please help guide me.




Hi Renee and welcome to the board. I'm glad you found us and decided to reach out for some support...
I'm sorry you and your family are having to deal with these issues regarding your mom. I know it has to be heartbreaking AND nerve-wracking (to say the least) when you are aware someone you love is troubled and yet they won't talk to you OR get adequate help. And of course, addiction complicates things (as you already pointed out) because there is concern that rather than honestly addressing the depression and safety issues she is instead looking to feed her addiction. And the addiction itself increases the risk of suicide because if/when she is using, the substances may negatively impact her impulse control, perception and judgement. NOT a good thing obviously!
Hi, Renee! I am very sorry to hear about your mom. Please take care of YOU. Be kind to your self & find ways to destress with this very intense situation looming.
ITA with what Lori has said. Getting help to your mom is imperative. Suicide is one of those *taboo* subjects that people have a hard time addressing. Though the average person sometimes mistakenly believes that talking about suicide means that the person has no real intent, that is totally false. People DO discuss ending their lives & it's their way of seeking help for themselves. That's why involving professionals now is so important. They know that the intent is there & that your mom is in real danger. Thankfully you have identified this.
I have the feeling that you live some distance from your mom. If that's so, your dad can always call the county mental health & ask for help. You could do that too, if you need more guidance in how to handle this situation. For now you are doing a good job.
We care about you & want the best for you & your family. Please keep in touch. GL & GBU! (((hugs))) jan
Thank you so much for your thoughts, care and concern. I'm only about 30 minutes away but do work FT outside the house. I'm a medical secretay and am answering the phone most of the day so its hard for me to make phonecalls