Raining here, the farmers are doing...
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| Sun, 05-04-2003 - 11:38pm |
Haven't heard from ds today, guess he got my message. Thanks for all the empathy and compassion, dear friends, I honestly don't know how I'd get through all the crap without you guys!!! I've cried more today than I did when Mike died, isn't that a sad state of affairs? Maybe that's what some of this is, a delayed reaction, emotions that have been pent up for eight months and now flowing over the dam. I wish there was an instruction book on how to keep a family together when the husband dies! Oh Heck! Make it one for all of life!!!
I wandered around the mall today waiting to get my nails done, never did, but ended up in the bookstore, my favorite refuge. I bought Dr. Phil's "Self Matters" for ds if he ever indicates he wants to change, and if not, I'll keep it for myself! So far, it's very interesting and humorous. Got the "Teen" one for dd for Mother's Day. I saw a display of "I'll Love You Forever", and that brought the tears again. If you don't know this book, get it from the library, it's a short one, and very touching. Used to read it to ds, couldn't get through it without my voice cracking, and now.....well, life goes on.
I might try to sleep in the recliner tonight, still a lot of acid and pressure in my chest, lying flat just doesn't work. I've done Tums and Pepcid, and my prescription Prilosec, nothing's working. Last night late, I thought I was having a heart attack. What does that feel like? I hear it's different for women than for men.
Well, got a little laundry and dishes done today, dd got some picking up done, so I guess I'll hit the sack, or the chair. Told my boss I won't be in tomorrow, going to try to see the doc. Thank you all again for the support.
Hugs, Pam

Hope today is a better day for you my friend.
Love
Mary
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