Bobbie's email healed my wounds....

Avatar for hulagirl_leilani
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Bobbie's email healed my wounds....
7
Sun, 05-11-2003 - 3:34pm


Aloha Ladies... Bobbie sent me this email about Mother's Day and it helped me to get over what ever I need to get over to celebrate Mother's Day for the first time in my life. As you know my Mother died when I was born. Sad part was she had hand wrote out a her last Will & Testament when she was 4 months preganent with me because she knew she would die if she had me. I know this to be true because of the date on the letter. Any how then came a very abusive step-mother which did the most horrifying things to my body that you couldn't even dream up in your nightmares. Any way I hated Mother's and Father's days until I read Bobbie's Mother Day email... This is what it said... Let me know what you think after you read this... Mahalo Bobbie for patching up my broken heart!

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Did you know that Mother's Day was suggested as a day of peace in the United States by Julia Ward Howe who protested the carnage of war in her bold proclamation of 1870? Decades later in 1907, the first Mother's Day observance was held at a church service honoring the memory of Anna Reese Jarvis in Grafton, West Virginia. Jarvis, an Appalachian homemaker, organized women during the Civil War to work for better sanitary conditions and to reconcile Union and Confederate neighbors.

Mother's Day Proclamation

Arise all women who have hearts, whether your baptism be that of water or of tears! Say firmly: "We will not have great questions decided by irrelevant agencies, our husbands shall not come to us, reeking with carnage, for caresses and applause. Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn all that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience. We women of one country will be too tender of those of another country to allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs."

From the bosom of the devastated earth a voice goes up with our own. It says "Disarm, disarm! The Sword of murder is not the balance of justice." Blood does not wipe out dishonor nor violence indicate possession.

As men have often forsaken the plow and the anvil at the summons of war, let women now leave all that may be left of home for a great and earnest day of counsel. Let them meet first, as women, to bewail and commemorate the dead. Let them then solemnly take counsel with each other as to the means whereby the great human family can live in peace, each learning after his own time, the sacred impress, not of Caesar, but of God.

In the name of womanhood and of humanity, I earnestly ask that a general congress of women without limit of nationality may be appointed and held at some place deemed most convenient and at the earliest period consistent with its objects, to promote the alliance of the different nationalities, the amicable settlement of international questions, the great and general interests of peace.

- Julia Ward Howe, 1870

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My thoughts after reading this is as follows....

This Mother's day is going to be different from the other 52 Mother's Day I have had to celebrate before... because now I know what Mother's Day is really about thanks to Bobbie. In spirit this day I will be holding hands with all you abused ladies and the other women in this world in asking for peace and love so all women no matter how bratty they are can be happy they were not aborted.

What a great woman Julia Ward Howe was to stand up to the world and say what's on her mind when in those times it was not a healthy thing to do for her being. I wonder how many women shunned her for not letting status quoi dictate her life. Some times ya got to ruffle feathers in order to bring about peace and love in this world. Amazing even in those days people would rather let things lay as they are injuring the hearts and souls of others instead of standing up and wronging rights in the world. I wonder how many people thought she was a trouble maker and judge her to be something she was not. Sad it took decades to recognize that she was not a trouble maker just ahead of her times.

There is too many people who look at the world and say it not my problem I do not want to create waves.... while others look at the world and say we can do better. All it takes is to lift our heads out of the sand and look around us and see the world can be a beautiful place if we band together and make it so. Hiding and running and ignoring and shunning these days just does not get it if we want a beautiful world for all of us. No one is greater or lesser then another no matter how much power they hold in their hand. I believe we all are at the same level trying to make the best we can out of what the supreme being has handed us in our lives.

Take care and be good to yourself... but above all do not allow any one tell you who you are or are not. You are a part of the universe no lesser then the trees and stars.... you are of value to the world and don't let any one tell you differently and believe them.

Aloha,

Leilani







Aloha,

Lei

 

Avatar for mindy46
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sun, 05-11-2003 - 4:11pm
i received that too leilani.how sad for you that your mom passed away before she and you got to know each other,and that you had to cope with a such a terrible person as a step mother.they say there are reasons in this life for everything leilani,but i dont know how anyone can justify abuse to another human being,especially a helpless child!i do think though that maybe this made you the strong , philosophic,and compassionate person you are today!! happy mothers day leilani!!((hugs))mindy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sun, 05-11-2003 - 5:41pm
Lei, I recieved that from Bobbie also. It is a shame you mother never got to see you turn into a beautiful women. Think how much she wanted you, even if she knew it might only be seconds together. Why some people abuse children, even birth mothers is beyond me. All children enter this world as gifts to be treasured. Those who do not realize this, more the fool they are.

If you are a mother though, birth, adoption, foster care or giving of your love to anothers child, the heart of a mother still beats in your chest. Happy Mothers Day to you.

Rain

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Avatar for hulagirl_leilani
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Sun, 05-11-2003 - 11:39pm
Mahalo Mindy,

Yeah I am telling ya Mother's and Father's day are really not to good of days for me as a matter of fact they are horrible.... I think of my Mom and think what if she would of lived. How would I be? Would I have been the person you Mindy and the other girls Know today..... and if not... how would I have turned out to be.... maybe I would of turn out to be the person some thing you all would think ....I am proud to know her? Just thoughts going through my brain on this day as I sit here all alone with my William.... Maybe I would of turned out to be something everyone in cyberspace and in real life would have been proud of to say yeah she is my friend! Or would have every one still think the same thoughts they think of me today. Yeah I think of all the good mothers in this world and how precious they are to every one is great. Butt..... what about all of us out here in the world.... with bad memories.

And should all of us with bad memories ruin your Mother's day... I mean who has the power over this day. the haves or the have nots. and why should one have more power over the other....why can't we all be equals.... ha ... why.... Is there more of us bad memory people .....then you.... and yes who cares if there is.... we are all one in this world ha.... but if that is true then the have nots has to understand the have is..... which is impossible for us... do you understand or am I just nuts..... we all make up this world and I do not believe that the have's is better the then the have nots.... Okay so you might be thinking I am trying to start a war with this post which is so bizzarre.... I am trying to make all of you girls see there is another side of your paradise here on our board....


I am happy for all you girls who are in heaven and your getting all that you think you should of got from this day.... but what about the rest of us... I know we all fend for our selves and in our spare time we help each other.... that's cool... because if I was in your shoes I would think the same way and think bad of others who's Mothers day brings nothing but bad memories what ever that is....

Mindy you and me have not seen eye to eye but Mindy I think higher of you then I do of others.... I Hope you and all the other nice Mothers on this board get all the nice stuff you deserve..... Love ya Chick ... Mindy...

Aloha,

Hula Girl

Aloha,

Lei

 

Avatar for hulagirl_leilani
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Sun, 05-11-2003 - 11:54pm
Ya Know rain spirit there is just something about you that I know if I read your posts they will cradel me in your arms. Weird ha... I don't even know you... Mahalo for your kind words.... I am not a mother because of the abuse I received ...... there is no way I would want to pass that on to the next generation.... love ya chick!

Aloha,

your Hula Girl

Aloha,

Lei

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 05-12-2003 - 1:38am
Leolani, you have a great heart. Thank you for what you added to the words of Julia Ward Howe.

Kat

Avatar for mindy46
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 05-12-2003 - 9:48am
lei first of all let me tell you that i am a person who doesnt make much of holidays.yes i do give birthday presents and xmas presents but i could very well live without all this halabalu,and that includes mothers and fathers day.i think that for those who still have their parents,everyday should be a day of respect for them,and that includes those of us who have kids,we dont need to set these days aside for celebration,for some celebrations are others heartaches,as yourself.as for how others think of you,well i dont worry too much about how people accept me or what they think,its how i learned to accept who i am,and i found out that i am my own best friend.be goood to yourself and dont beat yourself over your head and worry about friends.alot of people measure their popularity by the amount of friends they think they have and thats great too,but i learned a long time ago that friends come and go but i will be with myself forever!!now as for seeing eye to eye,viva la difference,thats what makes us all indivuduals!!if we all thought the same,what a dull world this would be!!!

leilani dont sit and think about the person you could or should have been,just believe in the person you have become,if you are happy with that person,then you have succeeded,if you are not happy with the person you have become then make a change.other then that,im off to take my apple/cherry pie out of the oven!!i find that happiness and fullfillment are in the kitchen for me today!!!enjoy your day lei!!((((hugs)))mindy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 05-12-2003 - 7:06pm
Lei you said it all. Wonderful post and hats off the BB for sending it:) Hugs, Bern
Hugs, Bernie