appreciate all the support

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2003
appreciate all the support
5
Sun, 05-25-2003 - 9:45am
good morning all,

i just read over my responses to my post concerning the

problems with my son, i cant thank all of u enough for posting your

opinions and support this has helped me alot during this difficult

time. all day yesterday i was sick to my stomach and couldnt eat or

do much of anything...it was a horrible feeling inside of me...today

the sensation feeling is gone and i am somewhat better...still a

little down,,,,but better than yesterday. i am sooo glad that i

posted my problem here, as many of u are so loving and understanding,

and like i said it does help to hear others opinions and get

support...again thank you all for listening,,,,and i will keep u

posted....my son called me yesterday ..and i went on how disappointed

i was in him....i told him there was an email waiting for him under

my daughters name whom he was visiting in that letter i told him

how he had 6 months to straighten out...and i no longer had a son,

not to call, etc.....my daughter called me later and said my son

was upset and tearing up alot....but she said it was the best thing

i could of done....it will be hard for me over the next few months,

but i pray for strength for my son to get on his feet and better

himself....he is the only one that can achieve that....again ladies

thank u...

hugs

mary
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Sun, 05-25-2003 - 12:38pm
Mary you hang in there and just know you are doing the right thing.

Hugs

Mare

                          &n
Avatar for mindy46
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sun, 05-25-2003 - 5:17pm
mary i have a nephew at the age of 31 who is like your son.he is now in AA,and thru counseling and therpists is getting the help he needs.he has been helped by everyone in his family,parents,and sisters.they all realized they were just enabling him to live the way he wanted.he has had so many chances and maybe now he has finally begun to realize that the only one that can help him is himself!!!be good to yourself,you will feel sad inside,afterall he is your son,you love him and want the best for him!!but be strong,not only for yourself but for him.he has to help himself first before you can!!good luck!!(((hugs)))mindy
Avatar for capwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sun, 05-25-2003 - 6:56pm
Just catching up here Libby. I think you are doing the only and best thing possible. Being a good mother means being tough. He had no accountability or responsibility so no reason to grow up. As hard as this is on you please be strong and stick it out. That way you are setting an even greater example for him. We're here to listen hon. So come here to vent, cry, scream and laugh. Many hugs.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-1999
Sun, 05-25-2003 - 10:57pm
Mary, Hang in there! At 25 it is way past time for your ds to realize he IS an adult and needs to be responsible for himself. He has to be the one to take the responsibility. It is not up to you or your dd to make all things right for him. Yes it is hard, Yes it is sad..but in the long run it is what is best for all!

Stay Strong!

Hugs

RJ


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 05-26-2003 - 1:38am
Mary, I jsut read your post down there. What a tough thing for you to have to do. You really have my sympathy and support. Sometimes when we try to help our kids (or other people too) we do too much for too long and it's not actually good for them at all. At some point they have to take responsibility for themselves and we has parents have to let them...or make them, as the case may be, by stepping back and refusing to be the means by which they can continue to evade that resposibility. But even when you know it's the right thing to do, it must be so hard. That six months will probably seem like years but I'm hoping so much that at the end of it, you find that your son has become a man, and a resposible one at that. Good luck to you.

Kat