Unsolicited advice

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2006
Unsolicited advice
25
Wed, 02-27-2008 - 7:47pm

I can post this now that I have calmed...


as many of you know..my dgs was born last week and we had the dgds for 4 days...we brought them to the hospital Sat to meet their brother..it was great and special...they were so cute...I got lots of great photos


as we were leaving for the hospital, I realized I hadn't spent much time with my hair  but I thought "Who will care about my hair with all this going on?"


Now I know....I sent the photo show to many friends, inc an old one from waaay back...from my hometown..in college we worked together summers...haven't seen her in at least 20 yrs...she lives in Alaska....but at Xmas she put a letter in her card and her email and expressed a desire to be more in touch.


I thought..perfect opportunity..send her these photos of me and my family


in her reply she wrote:


Barbara, you must get a new style to your hair.  No offense, but your doo is 40 years old.  I bet if you got a shorter style the kids in the HS would not recognize  you when you subbed!  Especially in the granny reading glasses, it is like 1969 all over again!  Let go!!!!


I was shocked! First of all: I like my hair the way it is, I do not want it shorter and I had just been to my hairdresser on Thurs..she keeps me current!


and why would I want the HS kids not to recognize me? they love me just the way I am!


And as for the glasses: I emailed back that they were not "granny glasses" but rather "fashion frames" that even the younger folks wear...and perhaps they don't have them in Alsaka


she emailed back that she hoped she hadn't offended me! ha...I said when someone says :no offense" usually one follows! and that ,yes, I was offended


I didn't say "wow looked like you gained a lot of weight" when I saw her Xmas photo,,LOL


I did tell her I didn't need negativity in my life, I prefer my friends accepting and supportive!


But this does not make me inclined to keep in touch!


ok..now I have vented..thanks for listening...I am letting it go


anyway I went today to hold dgs...he is already 6 days old! they grow up so fast! LOL


and  THAT is the important stuff!!


we had 10 days of friends and visitors and dgds....very good


hugs


 


 

Dutch



 


bearbearThe Cliffs of Moher, Looking Towards Hag's Head from O'Brian's Tower, County Clare, Eire Photographic Print by Gavin HellierCliffs Of Moher

Blarney Castle, Co.Cork

Blarney Castle, County Cork, Munster, Eire (Republic of Ireland) Photographic Print by J Lightfoot


 


 


 


 


 


Ireland, Muckross House, Killarney- Horse and Car Photographic Print by Keith Levit


M


 


 


 


Muckross House, Killarney


 


Dutch

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2006
Fri, 03-07-2008 - 5:46pm

TY!


I told some of my friends at school about what this gal had said. Yesterday one of them noted a HS girl, a fashionista, who had the same kind of glasses.


I figure this person was way off base...if she can't be constructive and positive..I don't need it


long and smooth is in!


thanks again!


hugs


Dutch

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 03-11-2008 - 2:03am

Dutch, I love and envy your hair. I don't think there's anything wrong with it at all. As I said in an earlier post, I've gotten to the point where I'm carefully arranging the few hairs I have in front to make it look like there's more there. So I'd give anything for your hair. It's great.


Kat

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2006
Tue, 03-11-2008 - 6:47am

TY!


my family: good hair and big feet! LOL its in the genes!


well, you can see how potent unkind words can be


I am back to being ok with it!

Dutch



Dutch

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2007
Sun, 03-16-2008 - 2:47am

Hi Dutch,


Just read your post. Good grief! I 've never figured out how people have the nerve to say things like that! And, I also wonder what she expects you to do with that "helpful" info? Are you supposed to now run out, have a makeover and send her a new picture??? Hey, I've seen your picture and I think you look just fine. Hope you don't change a hair (or hairdo)! Many hugs, Janet

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2006
Sun, 03-16-2008 - 9:36am

Thank you very much, Janet!!


It is unbelievable the damage people can do with words!


yes, what did she think I would do?


actually the photo she saw was a "bad hair day"..I had been watching the dgds, 1 and 3, for days and wasn't taking time..concentrating on them


it did actually cross my mind to send her another photo and then I thought"why?" who is she? and why do I need to justify myself to her?


you'll be happy to know..no changes!!


hugs


Dutch

 

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