I am really so happy about this...(long)

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-1998
I am really so happy about this...(long)
24
Thu, 09-25-2008 - 5:40pm

Many of you don't know the story of my DD and her little boy, my grandboy, Hunter. About 3 weeks after he was born by C-section, she got up in the middle of the night and caught her DH (insert your own meaning of D) having at it with another woman. He had not been very good to her to begin with, then this.


So she and Hunter came to live with Frank and me for about a year when we were in Spokane. She moved back down here about the time of my hip surgery, got an apt. and a job, and with some help got on her feet. Ex-DH grudgingly and very erradically paid child support.


We moved to FL for a year, then back because dear little Hunter-man was diagnosed with autism and DD needed support.


Flash forward to yesterday. DD and her new, wonderful DH have been getting mail from an attorney representing ex-DH who was complaining about his obligations when he doesn't see Hunter, and even (grrr) hinting that he wasn't his son. (You can tell by looking --it's obvious he is, unfortunately).


Well DD and the wonderful new DH responded by saying that he could either 1) keep his obligations and work up to visitations if he has solved his alcohol problems, or 2) sign Hunter over for step-parent adoption.


Yesterday they received a response saying he would sign the adoption papers. Obviously he only wanted out of the child support obligation.


I feel 2 ways about this. One, I'm so happy that DD's DH loves Hunter enough to make him his legal son. He's a great guy, and Hunter deserves him, whether he understands any of this or not.


But two, I feel really sorry for DD's ex-DH and his family, but not too much. Because of their choice to never make an effort to see Hunter, they have no idea what a wonderful little guy they're missing out on. He is truly a blessing to me. As his grandmother, I can only shake my head in wonderment.


His other "new" grandparents love him to death, too. I'm just so, so, so happy Hunter will have a complete family who love him so much. And good riddance to the others. It's their loss.


Just wanted to share...sorry about the length.


 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-1998
Fri, 09-26-2008 - 4:29pm

Thank you, Mare...I know you probably have very strong feelings about this. I am so happy and just wanted to share with my friends.


Hugs,


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-1998
Fri, 09-26-2008 - 4:30pm

Thanks Rain...Hugs!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-1998
Fri, 09-26-2008 - 4:31pm

Oh, I will! He loves Granny-hugs!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-1998
Fri, 09-26-2008 - 4:32pm

Yes, I am thrilled that he is going to have a happy, stable family life. I'm very thankful!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-1998
Fri, 09-26-2008 - 4:33pm

Yes, you're right, Kaci...he is much better off. Thank you for the hugs!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-1998
Fri, 09-26-2008 - 4:36pm

Yes, he is very much loved. I'm so happy; DD's DH and his family are wonderful people. Couldn't ask for better.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-1998
Fri, 09-26-2008 - 4:37pm

Yes, some people can be like you say, sickening. Frank says her ex-DH is "a perfect waste of human space and oxygen." LOL, he is a bit opinionated!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-1998
Fri, 09-26-2008 - 4:41pm

Thank you, Suzanne! It's been a long time worrying about DD and Hunter. So maybe this is one time when all that worry paid off. ??


Thank you for your best wishes!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-1998
Fri, 09-26-2008 - 4:45pm

Yep, he is a great guy! He loves Hunter so much, you can tell. He is there at the school meetings with the teachers and therapists and everything. Very involved.


My heart does kind of ache for his bio-grandparents. They were odd people, but I just can't imagine if they knew Hunter at all that they'd separate themselves from them. I guess I'll never know... or understand.


Thanks, Gabby....I hope you're doing better each day. Hugs!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-1998
Fri, 09-26-2008 - 4:47pm

Thanks, Min! It's definitely one of those!


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