Good evening ladies, **m

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Good evening ladies, **m
5
Tue, 05-27-2003 - 7:54pm
Lord God HELP, my poor dh finally lost it with his

mom, she will push push push, and this time she

went to far, she accused Vern and I of not doing

enough, and that when she told him to come give

her a hug, by god he better do it, now get over

here and thats when he lost it. She does not know

the meaning of the word lady, she has been this

way all of her life and vern finally told her just

that. Sorry ladies to burden you, but I really am

worried about Vern, I can handle the old gal, but

he has a bleeding ulcer and he is going to end up

in the hospital again. I don't think Dr. Phil could

help her. She has been with us only a week and Vern

says it seems like its been 6 months, I got 2hrs sleep

last night and he 6 only because I heated some apricot

brandy for him. Cal I do not know how you did it you

must of had an angel for a MIL. Thanks for letting me

blow off steam. Betty (((((((hugs)))))))

Avatar for mindy46
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 05-27-2003 - 10:05pm
(((betty)))so sorry to hear you and vern are having such stress with mom!!! life sure doesnt get any easier,does it!!!(((hugs)))mindy
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Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 12:11am
Thanks mindy, she is 88 and my dh has to come first.

Betty hugs.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 3:56am
Dear Betty - what a hard time for you and Vern. It seems to me that all would be better off with a care facility - or hospice - instead of causing so much pain for everyone. I wouldn't think twice about it. As you said - Vern comes first - as do you! Take care of yourselves - show your love for DMIL - but insist that she gets care elsewhere. Rosemary
Avatar for m6artha
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 8:33am
I agree with Rosemary one hundred percent!If you don't do that you be upfront and center with her, sick or not.Let her know that if she keeps it up she will be sitting alone in her room.She does have to know that or you two are the ones that suffer and you sure do have to protect Vern.If she's ready for Hospice you will get help for bathing and she will be given strong drugs for pain.You need help, and don't let her dictate.It seems that acting like a spoiled child she has gotten her way all her life.

May God keep me as sweet as I am(just don't ck with my kids)martha

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Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 9:02am
It seems like this type of situation happens to most of us at one time or another. I wonder why people get so angry and demanding as they age. I sure don't have any answers for you but I definately can commiserate with you. We're still dealing with my dad and his angry outbursts and his verbal attacks. At least with him in a home we don't have to deal with it constantly and we still know that he's getting good care. Take care of yourself and your dh..... kaci