Good afternoon y'all..........
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| Tue, 01-27-2009 - 5:08pm |
We got a message on our answering machine on Sunday; it was from our niece who had lived with us off and on for about 10 years from the time she was 16. We haven't seen or heard from her since her Grandfather's death, when she stood in the parking lot of our clinic and screamed at DH that we were thieves. She thought that the old man had money when he died, and that her part of the family wasn't getting any of it. The old man left his house to her cousin, and the first niece was firmly convinced that we had something to do with his will (we didn't, we were only named executors). It seems that her eldest son (who also lived with us, while she and her husband were separated) will be getting married next month. The wedding will take place in AZ, and I think there were only three reasons for this invitation (1.) a gift (2.) live bodies on the groom's side of the church (3.) the ability to say; "You were invited". I also think that she is going to be coming into our lives, if she can, because she knows we have money and things that she wants.
This girl re-married her husband; we bought the wedding cake as well as other items. These were no small expenditures for us, at a time when we couldn't particularly afford the extra expenditures. We picked up that beautiful cake, that one of our client's made, paid for it and took it to the wedding. When the time came for the reception she came up to me, and said that her Mother had invited a 'bunch of the people who worked with her at Delta' to the reception, and she asked us not to come! I was flabbergasted, but I did as asked, and told my DH that we would just go home.
I do not like the man that she re-married, because he turned off the heat in the house when that baby was only 6 months old. When the niece didn't leave right-a-way, he turned the water off. She brought the baby and all of the things that were needed and came to our house. It was very cold, and there were things that she still needed for herself and the child. I went with her while it was sleeting and snowing (y'all know that doesn't happen often around here) to buy diapers, clothing, formula etc. I paid for some of that stuff too, because she certainly didn't have any money.
We haven't seen this 'child' in more than 20 years.
Now, my question for you ladies, would you just ignore the wedding invitation?> Or, does that make me as small as she?
Y'all please join me at the sink, and give me some feedback!
lottie77~~~

Oh my. You have relatives just like mine - only know me when they want something. Try doing what I do in those situations - ask yourself what would you tell your best friend if this was happening to her? Would you tell her to continue to be disrespected? Would you tell her to leave the door open a crack so this unpleasant person (forget that she's a relative) can push her way in? Would you tell her that you can't chose your relatives, but can choose your friends?
When my relatives are so transparent in their motives that I can see right through, I have no problem conveniently ignoring them. I'd respond with a card and reasonable check (which is probably all they want anyway), and go on with my life.
Jacquie
TY, Jacquie, those are good questions to ask myself.
lottie77~~~
I will be happy to belly up to the sink for some "Dutch" courage--thanks for the invite!
Hugs,
Carol
Good question Lottie, and I wouldn't even have to think about what I would do if it were me.