ever feel like not doing enough for baby

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
ever feel like not doing enough for baby
6
Sun, 03-07-2004 - 10:56pm

some days especially after reading all sorts of first from others on other boards.. i feel like i am not doing enough for my ds .. like what and i missing..what am i not doing.. ds learned to roll finally last week and can sit on his own and baby talks.. but there are so many things he's just not interested in... he was from the start a high needs baby!! and his attention spam is about a milli second or less.. i think we have bought every toy in the store to find things that amuse him and the only thing was the JUMPEROO> YIPPIE best thing ever made but

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2004
Mon, 03-08-2004 - 9:39am
Your ds is only a month younger than my dd, so hopefully some of the things that do with her will work for you. I think at this stage, the babies are really into exploring and seeing how the world around them works so I try to provide things that have a different shape, feeling or sound. I've gotten pretty creative because I don't want to go out and buy toys that she's only going to use for a few months and then grow tired of them. I've found lately that dd loves to make noise so when I'm in the kitchen, I will often times give her a plastic bowl and wooden spoon to bang together (it's loud but it keeps her stimulated). I've also "created" a new toy that she just loves. I went to the $1 store and brought a plastic box with a lid. I feel the box up with different toys (blocks, rings, etc) and either close the box and let her shake it and try to figure how to open it or I'll open it and she'll have fun playing with the toys and taking them out of the box and putting them back in. This amuses her for hours! I change the objects in the box regularily to keep her interested.

Another idea that I have it to buy the Gymboree Baby Play book. I've gotten some great age appropriate game ideas from there. Right now, I'm trying to teach dd to crawl and there are some activites for that...promoting stretching, etc.

Bottom line, don't feel bad if you're not entertaining your ds every moment. It's totally okay for him to play on his own. Especially right now while you're scrabbling trying to move...don't worry as long as ds seems happy and content. Babies love the car...very soothing. You might want to think about getting one of those thingies that attaches to the back of the seat of the car to give him something to look at/play with if you're going to be on the road a lot. Also, music CDs and books on tape are a hit.

I hope this helps!

Laura

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2004
Mon, 03-08-2004 - 10:54am
I recommend you pick up one or two of the Baby Einstein series video tape/dvd. My DS is only 7 weeks, and he's enthralled by the images and sounds. I confess to using them a couple of times as a babysitter while I had to make some phone calls - entertained him for almost an hour, and probably could have gone longer if I needed it to. Mostly we only watch about 15 minutes a day, and he never takes his eyes off the screen.

I was able to pick up a 4 dvd set at BJ's for about $50 - it has Baby Newton, Shakespere, Einstein and Bach.

Michelle

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2003
Mon, 03-08-2004 - 4:06pm
my dd also loves the baby einstein videos. She has couple of them, and can't get enough of them, she will watch them over and over and over if I let her. I usually just lay out a blanket and pillows on the floor put her in the middle, and pile toys around her, and let her watch and play. It's the only time I can shower or make somrthing to eat!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2004
Mon, 03-08-2004 - 4:12pm
HI, I FEEL THE SAME WAY. MY DAUGHTER AND I ARE GETTING CABIN FEVER. I FEEL LIKE SHE'S NOT GOING TO KNOW ANYTHING BUT WHAT'S IN OUR LIVING ROOM. THE WORST IS THAT I KEEP TALK SHOWS ON ALOT OF THE DAY SO I CAN HEAR SOME ADULT CONVERSATION IN THE BACK GROUND AND I FIND HER WATCHING IT ALOT. I DON'T LIKE HER WATCHING SO MUCH TV BUT I FEEL LIKE THE TV IS MY ONLY CONNECTION TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD. I'M HOPING ONCE IT GETS NICE OUTSIDE THERE WILL BE ALOT MORE TO DO. WE HAD A COUPLE NICE DAYS LAST WEEK AND I TOOK HER FOR A WALK AND WE WENT TO THE PARK. IF YOUR SON CAN SIT UP, THE SWINGS ARE A BIG HIT. THERE ARE SWINGS WITH SUPPORT AND TWO HOLES FOR THEIR LEGS TO GO THROUGH. MY DAUGHTER LOVES IT.

TANYA

MOMMY TO MAKENNA 3-10-03
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2003
Tue, 03-09-2004 - 8:55am
Yes, I have felt that way. My son is my first child. He is just about 7 months. I am home with him 100% and I've always felt that I'm not doing enough, even though I know deep down that I am doing OK. The reason I have doubts is because I'm still getting used to not having my "old life" where I could do what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it. Then I'd feel guilty wishing for more freedom or the chance to read my novels for hours on end instead of getting little brackets of time. I realized that sometimes I'd be kind of bored trying to entertain my son! Then I felt like a bad mom. It's been much easier as he got older, past the newborn stage. Now he can entertain himself much more.

The first 3 or 4 months made me wonder if I really enjoy spending time with my son and after some thinking and talking to mom friends, I realized that even though I long for more uninterrupted reading time or just some alone time without guilt, I do enjoy trying to entertain Matthew, just not constantly. My friends made me realize that it's OK to need some downtime myself and that it's normal to not want to entertain the baby ALL the time. As long as we interract with our child for a good part of the day as well as the basics (feeding, diaper changes...), our job is done. Well, not done, but you know what I mean. Also, you can make faces & talk to baby while doing housework, too.

Now, since he can finally sit up, it has opened up a huge time frame for me to either get other stuff done or even watch a TV show in the background while he's sitting, facing me, playing with toys and watching me. He loves his Baby Bach video, too. There is no way to keep children from TV so I have decided not to feel guilty about TV.

I know this was long, but I think you are doing fine as long as you spend some time face to face with baby. That lessens guilt for me. I try to read to Matthew and he turns pages and eats the book, too. But I try to continue reading because anytime he hears my voice helps him learn. So keep reading. Since your baby gets bored easily, have your baby with you playing w/toys in whatever room you need to get your own stuff done in. Then in the middle of your own work, switch baby to tummy/crawl time. Then switch again to sitting in another room maybe with PBS on. If you don't have one, consider a play gym like the Leap Start Learning Gym. Your baby can lie down & observe, then can sit up & watch. Make a list of things you can do quickly to alleviate boredom and then it will sink into your mind and it will become automatic as you go through your day - you won't have to stop and think, "What should I have baby do now?" When my son gets bored and I'm really busy with a lot of housework, I automatically know to put him in front of his Baby Bach video. He's happy for a 1/2 hour. Hopefully this long post will help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Tue, 03-09-2004 - 9:56am

thanks for some of the suggestions!! i appreciate it.. i guess i shouldn't feel so bad about letting him watch tv sometimes.. he loves noggin, especially oobi and seasame too!! my mom used tv as a babysitter for my little brother and that always drove me nuts. but this week so much needs to get done that i guess i have no choice.. but right now he is starting to get sick too so that makes me feel even worse.. he had rsv right after thanksgiving and he is starting to show all the signs again. so yesterday was major attention.. he wasn't feeling good and i got squat done..lol..


he did like the tupperware with toys in it!! as long as he doesn't fall over face first again.. heeh ee.. he wants it.. grabs at is.pushes it too far away and then nose dives after it :)