Help me justify this to myself!!
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| Wed, 05-04-2005 - 11:19am |
I currently have a 3.5 year old son and work full time outside the home. I had a very bad first marriage but was remarried in December to a wonderful man who takes great care of both me and my son. I recently left a management position at my company for a non-management position that is not as demanding or stressful. Since my home life is so good now I want to make sure that I still have enough energy to take care of my family when I get home from work instead of just collapsing from exhaustion and stress.
I would eventually like to scale back even more to part time work at my company or, even better, quitting altogether so that I can stay home. We need to pay off some debt before that is an option. So if I do quit it will most likely not be for another year or so. At that point I will only have about one year before my son starts kindergarten. My DH has a 15 year old son from his first marriage and says that he thinks that once kids start school it is still helpful to have one parent staying at home because the demands of getting a child to and from school and activities can be even greater than the demands when they are home all day. So my DH is completely supportive of whatever I decide to do but I am having some trouble justifying this to myself. It seems like most women who are SAHMs, stay home from the birth of their child and then may gradually work their way back into the workforce once the child starts school. I will be doing exactly the opposite. Is that weird? Has anyone here started staying at home either right before or right after you child started school? We will not be having any more children so there won't be any other little ones coming along for me to care for at home during infancy and toddlerhood in the future. Any words of wisdom will be appreciated!

Hi! I think any time is a great time to become a stay at home mom. Your hubby is right about how demanding life with kids can be when they are in school. I have three children, two go to school, and one here at home with me. When you are a stay at home mom with kids in school, believe me, you will be busy. I spend the time they are away at school cleaning, running errands, etc. That way, things are usually in order for when I pick them up after school. Also, to "get out" I do involve myself with their school. Right now, I am painting scenery for the second grade play (and I don't even have a second grader!) lol But still, I am in the same school my third grader is in.
Basically, in a nutshell, I don't think there is any "right" time to choose to be a stay at home mom. Your kids always need you, whether in preschool, or high school.
Hugs, Jenn
I just wanted to tell you, I am pretty much in the same situation as you. I have a 10 year old DD and I have worked for the same company since she was one. I just had a DS eighteen months ago. I was originally working full time until about 4 years ago. I scaled back my hours to part-time. Well now, I am seriously considering staying home. It takes so much out of me because although I only work 20 hours a week I work late nights until 2 am. So needless to say, I am exhausted after runnung my oldest around and taking care of a toddler. If you are blessed to have a DH who is supportive, I say stay home. You can always go back into the workforce if you decide later that you need to work. Hope I helped a little.
Julia
Julia
Proud Mommy of Macey and Reece
I am staying home even when the kids are in school for that reason.
I want to be here when they are sick and need to come home, for field trips, eating lunch with them, programs, reading or helping teachers with the class work.
I feel it is needed if you have the time and can afford to stay home and do it.
Right now I do stay home with my daughter who is almost one, and I do say that I will go back to work once my kids are in school,,,, but more than likely if we can a afford it I will probably not go back just for the reasons of what your dh and you said! I want to be able to volunteer and go on filed trips and do the extra stuff with them after school:) Plus be there for my dh so working would really in my opinion be too much for me:) But If financially we need for me to work of course I will:)
Hug hth,